"You should never assume. You know what happens……" — Ellen DeGeneres
"You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled."
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Ellen DeGeneres
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247 Quotes by Ellen DeGeneres
Ellen DeGeneres has 247 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Sometimes when I am driving I get so angry at inconsiderate drivers that I want to scream at them. But…
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It was so important for me to lose everything, because I found out what the most important thing is, which…
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I had no intention of becoming a comedian. I just wanted to make people happy. I tried everything-I shucked oysters,…
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Portia and I have been married for 4 years and they have been the happiest of my life. And in…
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You can always tell when the relationship is over. Little things start getting on your nerves, 'Would you please stop…
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The way I see it... If you need both of your hands for whatever it is you're doing, then your…
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It feels good. Kinda like when you have to shut your computer down, just sometimes when it goes crazy, you…
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I'm glad I'm funny. I'm glad I make people happy, because that's very important. But I'm proud to be known…
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I'm going to be kind, because then it all just kind of spreads, and the world is a little nicer…
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Procrastination isn't the problem. It's the solution. It's the universe's way of saying stop, slow down, you move too fast.
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Something big happened over the weekend. Something that affects everybody, all over the world. George Clooney got married.
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We're told to go on living our lives as usual, because to do otherwise is to let the terrorists win,…
See all 247 quotes by Ellen DeGeneres »
More Ass Quotes
This quote is filed under Ass Quotes,
one of 2,172 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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Most chick singers say 'if you hurt me, I'll die'... I say, 'if you hurt me, I'll kick your ass.'
— Pat Benatar
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I get satisfaction of three kinds. One is creating something, one is being paid for it and one is the…
— William F. Buckley, Jr.
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A man that hoards up riches and enjoys them not, is like an ass that carries gold and eats thistles.
— Richard Burton
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If it's illegal to rock and roll, throw my ass in jail!
— Kurt Cobain
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I almost resent the whole fashion thing. Good God- never wearing the same thing twice and all of those things.…
— Jennifer Aniston
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When I die, bury me on my stomach and let the world kiss my ass.
— LL Cool J
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I felt like I was definitely robbed, and I refuse to give any politically correct bullshit ass comment. I was…
— Kanye West
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The biggest sin is sitting on your ass.
— Florynce Kennedy
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Life's hard. It's even harder when you're stupid.
— John Wayne
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Life is never easy for those who dream.
— Robert James Waller
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We view ourselves on the eve of battle. We are nerved for the contest, and must conquer or perish. It…
— Sam Houston
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I hope you're all Republicans.
— Ronald Reagan
See all 2,172 Ass Quotes »