"A mom and dad found an S&M magazine……" — Dana Carvey
"A mom and dad found an S&M magazine under their 10-year-old son's bed, and the dad said, 'Well, we sure can't spank him.'"
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Dana Carvey
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37 Quotes by Dana Carvey
Dana Carvey has 37 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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I know it's a cliche, but the whole family is just whacked. I mean, we're all out of our minds.…
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While many comics have a secret persona, I fundamentally want to be myself.
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I've never really worked on them. Just once in a while one hits me and makes me laugh. My Al…
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I used to sneak up to the 8th floor and watch Eddie Murphy and Joe Piscopo rehearsing 'Saturday Night Live'…
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The two things that can hurt you are if you need money or if you need fame. Those are the…
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I have this dream life where I get to be a celebrity but I get to navigate the world fairly…
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If she were a President, she'd be Babe-raham Lincoln!
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Am I not turtley enough for the Turtle Club? Turtle! Turtle!
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If I only ran when nothing hurt, I would never run.
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I think free speech is probably the coolest thing we have in this country, and again, you can label it…
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It's almost like he's started to sound even more exotic the more people started doing him. I don't know why,…
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Please, O ye Lord, keep Jim Bakker behind bars.
See all 37 quotes by Dana Carvey »
More Bed Quotes
This quote is filed under Bed Quotes,
one of 3,432 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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I'm sure most of us remember being a kid and you have all of this endless time where two weeks…
— Andrea Arnold
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I'm absolutely strict about it. When I land, I put my watch right, and I don't care what I feel…
— David Attenborough
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Evil is unspectacular and always human, and shares our bed and eats at our own table.
— Wystan Hugh Auden
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A man can do a television interview and roll out of bed 15 minutes before; it's just not the same…
— Michele Bachmann
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I wake up every morning, look in the mirror and ask, 'Am I a sex symbol?' Then I go back…
— Antonio Banderas
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I have three phobias which, could I mute them, would make my life as slick as a sonnet, but as…
— Tallulah Bankhead
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The heart of the jealous knows the best and most satisfying love, that of the other's bed, where the rival…
— Djuna Barnes
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Birth control that really works - every night before we go to bed we spend an hour with our kids.
— Roseanne Barr
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Remember how you used to be able to feel your bed breathing and the walls spinning when you were a…
— Lynda Barry
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One of the secrets of a long and fruitful life is to forgive everybody everything everynight before you go to…
— Bernard Baruch
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This life is a hospital in which every patient is possessed with a desire to change his bed.
— Charles Baudelaire
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Early to bed and early to rise is a bad rule for anyone who wishes to become acquainted with our…
— George Ade
See all 3,432 Bed Quotes »