"I bet a guy at a bar 50……" — Christopher Titus
"I bet a guy at a bar 50 bucks that I was more dysfunctional than he was. He raped me. So I tipped him. I'm very competitive."
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Christopher Titus
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23 Quotes by Christopher Titus
Christopher Titus has 23 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Born free. Taxed to death.
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Everyone has an enemy. It's why God gave us baseball bats. Well, He gave us trees, but we knew what…
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God bless America. But God, please help Canada.
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If at first you don't succeed, then drag racing isn't for you.
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No problem is so big and difficult that it can't be blamed on somebody else.
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Passion, manners, and 80 ounces of beer will win the heart of any woman. And if it doesn't, you'll be…
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Revenge is good. It's what separates us from the animals and the hippies.
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Screwed-up people settle fights through violence. Screwed-up people start wars that could kill millions. Normal people settle fights through cookies,…
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Take the time to smell the roses. Sooner or later, you'll inhale a bee and die.
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The government favors the most diplomatic language. That's why any letter to them should always start with, "Dear turkeys and…
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We are brought into this world cold, weak, and helpless. Then it gets worse.
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Whenever you're pissed off, just remember that it's better than being pissed on.
See all 23 quotes by Christopher Titus »
More Bar Quotes
This quote is filed under Bar Quotes,
one of 855 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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Hemingway is terribly limited. His technique is good for short stories, for people who meet once in a bar very…
— Wystan Hugh Auden
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When a little more than a teenager, I was a piano-bar pianist in the land where I was born and…
— Andrea Bocelli
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The American legal industry is a medieval guild in which the prosecutors, bar, and bench join hands to ensure that…
— Conrad Black
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I started out mopping floors, waiting tables, and tending bar at my dad's tavern. I put myself through school working…
— John Boehner
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My dad and my uncles owned a bar outside of Cincinnati. I worked there growing up, mopping floors, waiting tables.
— John Boehner
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The need to be right all the time is the biggest bar to new ideas.
— Edward de Bono
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The girl I find who wants to talk about quantum theory in a bar is the one I want to…
— Brandon Boyd
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When I go to a bar, I don't go looking for a girl who knows the capital of Maine.
— David Brenner
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I'm the type of person who doesn't want to sit alone in a restaurant or bar.
— Malin Akerman
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I can only say the first thing that pops into my mind is I remember, years ago, seeing kind of…
— Jimmy Buffett
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We have wasted History like a bunch of drunks shooting dice back in the men's crapper of the local bar.
— Charles Bukowski
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Now one thing I think is really lame, is if you're an artist and you go to a karaoke bar…
— Jason Aldean
See all 855 Bar Quotes »