Best Santa Claus Quotes
157 Santa Claus quotes by 132 unique authors
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Spirit and soul is horseshit of the worst sort. Obviously there are no fairies, no Santa Clauses, no spirits. What there is, is human goals…
— Albert Ellis
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In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?
— Rush Limbaugh
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I know I'm 38 but I insist that santa claus exists and he raped my mother when I was 9.
— Thom Yorke
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Please be informed, there is a Santa Claus.
— Jim Lovell
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Here comes Santa Claus! Here comes Santa Claus! Right down Santa Claus Lane!
— Gene Autry
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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus. Underneath the mistletoe last night. She didn't see me creep down the stairs to have a peep; She thought…
— Unknown Author
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For me growing up, Christmas time was always the most fantastic, exciting time of year, and you'd stay up until three in the morning. You'd…
— Chris Pine
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Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies!
— Francis Pharcellus Church
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It is all well and good for children and acid freaks to still believe in Santa Claus — but it is still a profoundly morbid…
— Hunter S. Thompson
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Sunday morning in America is the greatest hour of idolatry in the whole week. Why? Because most people who are even worshiping God, are worshiping…
— Paul Washer
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If Mitt Romney was Santa Claus, he would fire the reindeer and outsource the elves.
— Ted Strickland
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One of the saddest days of my life was when my mother told me Superman did not exist. I was a comic book reader. I…
— Geoffrey Canada
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When Tim Allen made The Santa Clause, I thought that was a delightful film. It took a modern sensibility but layered onto it a kind…
— Leonard Maltin
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No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now,…
— Francis Pharcellus Church
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Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and…
— Francis Pharcellus Church
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The real Santa Claus is at the mall.
— Daniel Handler
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Christmas always sucked when I was a kid because I believed in Santa Claus. Unfortunately, so did my parents. So I never got anything.
— Unknown Author
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Sit peacefully in a church and think of church history: witchburning perhaps, or child abuse, genocide, the amassing of disgusting wealth, the repression of women,…
— Kaz Cooke
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Our family was too strange and weird for even Santa Claus to come visit ... Santa, who was jolly - but, let's face it, he…
— Julia Sweeney
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Grown ups don't believe in Santa Claus. They vote.
— Pierre Desproges
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Now I admit that the notion of a warless world is a pleasant and attractive thought. But people who believe that there can be such…
— Unknown Author
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We're going to start with the injury report, obviously. Manning, Clark, Addai, Reggie Wayne, Freeney, Mathis, Brackett - all those guys will not play. Oh,…
— Rex Ryan
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I'm Santa Claus to these hoes without a reindeer.
— Nicki Minaj
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Harry Potter's like Santa Clause: something you can't see but wish was real so badly that you end up believing in it.
— Emma Watson
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Whenever you give someone a present or sing a holiday song, you're helping Santa Claus. To me, that's what Christmas is all about. Helping Santa…
— Louis Sachar
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Who Wrote These Santa Claus Quotes
132 authors contributed a total of 157 Santa Claus Quotes, led by these top contributors: