Penis Quotes

116 quotes by 65 authors

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Never mind, it's too long. — Patience Jr Kibabatoko
A Man's penis is so polite. It stands up so girls have a place to sit down. — Green Monk
Happiness Is Like Penis. It Always Looks Small But When You Learn To Share It, You Realize How Big It Can Be. — Green Monk
It's difficult for me to tell whether girls like me for who I am as a person. Damn my incredibly massive penis. — Green Monk
My penis wants to slam dance at your vagina concert. — Green Monk
In order to raise a child, you must first raise a penis. — Green Monk
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time. — Robin Williams
There are really not many jobs that actually require a penis or a vagina, and all other occupations should be open to everyone. — Gloria Steinem
There are very few jobs that actually require a penis or vagina. All other jobs should be open to everybody. — Florynce Kennedy
And you cant think niggas forget, niggas dont forget...last time I checked you wasnt handling the presidential penis correctly and I'm thinking how you gonna… — Katt Williams
'Cause see, I got the cleanest, meanest penis Ask Keisha, she the one who seen it Keish told Pam, Pam couldn't keep a secret Now… — Maino
I like Penis! — Charlotte Church
I've been a 3 time former IC Champion, I'm currently the Tag Team Champion. Hell, I've even told Mr. McMahon that he has a very… — Chris Jericho
PENIS VAGINA I LIKE WIMINZ SPERMMMMMMM YUM YUM YUMMY IN MY TUMMY! — Unknown Author
There was a man from Peru, who fell asleep in his canoe. He was dreaming of Venus holding his penis and he woke up with… — Funkadelic
There's so many accusations that are so ridiculous about Pete Wentz that are taken as the gospel...people just assume that he posted pictures of his… — Patrick Stump
Mixer: Let's go with the usual stuff, something dark and ominous. Like losing your penis is a bad thing. Peter Bretter: [sarcastically] Oh, you want… — Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Debbie: Who is that guy? Is that Ben's Rabbi? Is he the one that cuts the penis? Pete: I think it's Matisyahu. — Knocked Up (The Movie)
You think I'm an inventor? "He created a dick-skin condom, He hollowed out a penis and put it on", what the fuck? -Ben Stone — Knocked Up (The Movie)
McLovin? Were you violating that young girl? Were you violating her with your penis? -Officer Slater — Superbad

Who Wrote These Penis Quotes

65 authors contributed a total of 116 Penis Quotes, led by these top contributors: