Kid Everyone Quotes by Mike Birbiglia

More Quotes by Mike Birbiglia

Mike Birbiglia has 65 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

• What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.
• My friends drink everywhere. They even drink at the laundromat. I tried drinking at the laundromat, and I thought I was in…
• Sometimes, when you want to be in a place so badly, you'll do anything.
• I didn't realize how good I was with computers until I met my parents.
• The key to eating healthy is not eating any food that has a TV commercial.
• Does anyone know a word that rhymes with shark?
• Falling in love is a completely transcendent experience. It's like eating pizza-flavored ice cream
• Sometimes when I do a joke and it doesn't get a lot of laughs, it kind of feels like I'm doing jazz.…
• Someone stole my wallet last week. The guy called me up and he was mad at me. He was like 'you gotta…
• I love pizza so much, I would marry pizza, but it would just be an elaborate ploy to eat her whole family…
• ...And so we go and I meet his parents. And it's a very strange thing meeting your girlfriend's boyfriend's parents for the…
• Sex and pizza, they say, are similar. When it's good, it's good. When it's bad, you get it on your shirt.

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