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Best God Sayings by Mark Twain
- Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
- In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.
- God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.
- Man was made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.
- It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and…
- Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be…
- Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates.
- I am a great and sublime fool. But then I am God's fool, and all His works must be contemplated with respect.
- God created war so that Americans would learn geography.
- Man - a figment of God's imagination.
- The true Southern watermelon is a boon apart, and not to be mentioned with commoner things. It is chief of this world'd luxuries, king by…
- Being made merely in the image of God but not otherwise resembling him enough to be mistaken by anybody but a very near sighted person.
- I wonder if God created man because He was disappointed with the monkey.
- Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear-not absence of fear. Except a creature be part coward it is not a compliment to say it…
- All gods are better than their reputation.
- The gods offer no rewards for intellect. There was never one yet that showed any interest in it...
- Man proposes, but God blocks the game.
- If God is what people say there can be no one in the universe so unhappy as He; for He sees unceasingly myriads of His…
- God puts something good and loveable in every man His hands create.
- No man that has ever lived has done a thing to please God--primarily. It was done to please himself, then God next.
- There are many scapegoats for our sins, but the most popular one is Providence.
- The motto stated a lie. If this nation has ever trusted in God, that time has gone by; for nearly half a century almost its…
- More than once I have been humiliated by my resemblance to God the father; He is always longing for the love of His children and…
- Now I can only pray that there may be a God -- and a heaven -- or something better.
- God pours out love upon all with a lavish hand -- but He reserves vengeance for His very own.
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More God Quotes
- Whosoever is delighted in solitude is either a wild beast or a god. — Aristotle
- A tyrant must put on the appearance of uncommon devotion to religion. Subjects are less apprehensive of illegal treatment from a ruler… — Aristotle
- The gods too are fond of a joke. — Aristotle
- We have domesticated God's transcendence. We often learn about God at about the same time as we are learning about Santa Claus;… — Karen Armstrong
- Yes, all fundamentalists feel that in a secular society, God has been relegated to the margin, to the periphery and they are… — Karen Armstrong
- I was a lousy nun. I couldn't do it. I couldn't find God. It wasn't suitable for me. It is suitable for… — Karen Armstrong
- Whatever man uses without the fear of God, whatever he applies to the mere gratifying of his flesh, cannot fail to operate… — Johann Arndt
- If I were to say, 'God, why me?' about the bad things, then I should have said, 'God, why me?' about the… — Arthur Ashe
- To surrender to ignorance and call it God has always been premature, and it remains premature today. — Isaac Asimov
- If you have men who will exclude any of God's creatures from the shelter of compassion and pity, you will have men… — Francis of Assisi
- I have been all things unholy. If God can work through me, he can work through anyone. — Francis of Assisi
- It is not fitting, when one is in God's service, to have a gloomy face or a chilling look. — Francis of Assisi