Funerals Quotes by P.J. O'Rourke

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• Spare me the whispering, crowded room, the friends who come and gape and go, the ceremonious air of gloom - all, which… — Matthew Arnold
• I guess I do prefer a ball cap. I have performed without a cap, mostly at funerals and weddings. — Rodney Atkins
• When a nation's young men are conservative, its funeral bell is already rung. — Henry Ward Beecher
• Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours. — Yogi Berra
• I was terrible at straight items. When I wrote obituaries, my mother said the only thing I ever got them to do… — Erma Bombeck
• I have a hat. It is graceful and feminine and give me a certain dignity, as if I were attending a state… — Erma Bombeck
• I've been to many funerals of funny people, and they're some of the funniest days you'll ever have, because the emotions run… — Albert Brooks
• I seldom go into a natural history museum without feeling as if I were attending a funeral. — John Burroughs
• Time is passing. Yet, for the United States of America, there will be no forgetting September the 11th. We will remember every… — George W. Bush
• Funerals and weddings were commonplace, and nothing could have been so interesting to them as the coming of the end of the… — Edward Eggleston
• I hate funerals and would not attend my own if it could be avoided — Robert Tappan Morris
• Funerals are important rituals. They don't just recognize that a life has ended; they recognize that a life was lived. — Aaron Eckhart

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