Farts Quotes

56 quotes by 45 authors

I am happy everywhere except in places where I see glitz and rich farts. I am happiest in Brooklyn, where the concentration of rich farts… — Nassim Nicholas Taleb
I once lay in a white hospital for the dying and the dying self, where some god pissed a rain of reason to make things… — Charles Bukowski
Most people enjoy the sight of their own handwriting as they enjoy the smell of their own farts. — Wystan Hugh Auden
Farts come from no one and nowhere; they are anonymous emanations that belong to the group as a whole, and even when every person in… — Paul Auster
Purple light passed over the paper, but nothing happened. "Next!" Amy said. She was sure the man in black was going to burst in on… — Rick Riordan
A person who discreetly farts in an elevator is not a divine being, and a man needs to know this. — Robert Bly
Just let them sit in the goddam sun. But the world won't let them because there's nothing more dangerous than letting old farts sit in… — Frank McCourt
No Angie, it's instant. Like when someone trips in the cafeteria and you're laughing so hard milk comes out of your nose, the guy next… — George Lopez
You're all mad for words. Words are just farts from a lot of fools who have swallowed too many books. Give me things! — Robertson Davies
Ah, babies! Theyâ€™re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts. — Tina Fey
There's a Drunk Midget in My House Ah, babies! They're more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts. Like most… — Tina Fey
I swear, guys in groups are capable of the stupidest things." "Like war," Kellan says, heaping napkins and ketchup packets onto her tray. "And jumping… — Jay Asher
Have you been sniffing fairy farts? — Kim Harrison
Don't be more serious than God. God invented dog farts. God designed your body's plumbing system. God designed an ostrich. If He didn't do it,… — Peter Kreeft
There are more microbes per person than the entire population of the world. Imagine that. Per person. This means that if the time scale is… — Alan Bennett
Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat. — Nikhil Saluja
I farted:P XDDDD — Patience
Omfg xD soo I farted this morning.. and my mom said it was like a fart bubble.. xD cuz I farted then I went upstairs… — Patience
According to this farts smell and taste like rainbows — Killa
My farts smell like they shit their pants. — Green Monk

Who Wrote These Farts Quotes

45 authors contributed a total of 56 Farts Quotes, led by these top contributors: