Christmas Quotes

1693 Christmas quotes by 1089 unique authors

Thus one of Europe's most serious crises will be ended, and all of us, not only in Germany but those far beyond our frontiers, will… — Adolf Hitler
Why won't they let a year die without bringing in a new one on the instant, can't they use birth control on time? I want… — John Dos Passos
A merry Christmas to everybody! A happy New Year to the world! — Charles Dickens
Certain corpuscles, denominated Christmas Books, with the ostensible intention of swelling the tide of exhilaration, or other expansive emotions, incident upon the exodus of the… — William Makepeace Thackeray
Christianity is not a religion, it is a relationship. — Unknown Author
It is a fine seasoning for joy to think of those we love. — Moliere
My boy is a mean kid. I came home the other day and saw him taping worms to the sidewalk, he sits there and watches… — Rodney Dangerfield
It's always winter but it's never Christmas. — C.S. Lewis
Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard. — Andy Borowitz
Christmas sweaters are only acceptable as a cry for help. — Andy Borowitz
The principal advantage of the non-parental lifestyle is that on Christmas Eve you need not be struck dumb by the three most terrifying words that… — John Leo
There are 17 more shopping days until Christmas. So, guys, that means 16 more days till we start shopping, right? — Conan O'Brien
Christmas never would have caught on if it had been called Celebrate a Little Jew's Birthday. — Andy Borowitz
One thing I learned from drinking is that if you ever go Christmas caroling, you should go with a group of people. And also go… — Louis C. K.
This past Christmas, I told my girlfriend for months in advance that all I wanted was an Xbox. That's it. Beginning and end of list,… — Anthony Jeselnik
I've had this look for about a year. I usually grow this beard out around Christmas. I like to go to malls dressed as Jesus,… — Marc Maron
I set a personal record on Christmas. I got my shopping done three weeks ahead of time. I had all the presents back at my… — Demetri Martin
I'm not ashamed to be a Christian. But you don't have to be in the pew every Sunday to know that there's something wrong in… — Rick Perry
A Christmas tree--the perfect gift for a guy. The plant is already dead. — Jay Leno
Christmas is a stocking stuffed with sugary goodness. — Mo Rocca
Christmas is a holiday that we celebrate not as individuals nor as a nation, but as a human family. — Ronald Reagan
No sane local official who has hung up an empty stocking over the municipal fireplace is going to shoot Santa Claus just before a hard… — Al Smith
Christmas is a holiday that persecutes the lonely, the frayed, and the rejected. — Jimmy Cannon
I'm so depressed. Christmas is the worst of all. Holidays are terrible, worse than Sundays. I get melancholia. — David O. Selznick
Christ came to transform us from never enough people - to more than enough people; that through his poverty we may become rich. — Miroslav Volf

Who Wrote These Christmas Quotes

1,089 authors contributed a total of 1,693 Christmas Quotes, led by these top contributors: