Aspirin Quotes

70 quotes by 68 authors

America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin For one dollar and use it up in two weeks. — John Barrymore
The remedy now is two scotches and an aspirin, I think. — Harry Sinden
I will lift mine eyes unto the pills. Almost everyone takes them, from the humble aspirin to the multi-colored, king-sized three deckers, which put you… — Malcolm Muggeridge
The whole world is drunk and we're just the cocktail of the moment. Someday soon, the world will wake up, down two aspirin with a… — Dean Martin
Golf tips are like aspirin. One may do you good, but if you swallow the whole bottle you will be lucky to survive. — Harvey Penick
Estimates suggest that from 20 to 50 million Americans routinely, albeit illegally, smoke marijuana without the benefit of direct medical supervision. Yet, despite this long… — Frances M. Young
There is no such thing as a peace of soul approach to religion. It makes of God a gigantic Bayer Aspirin; take God three times… — John Powell
For toddlers I suggest leaving their mittens on year-round, indoors and out. That way they can't get into aspirin bottles, liquor cabinets, or boxes of… — P.J. O'Rourke
A smart mother suggests that her child bring an apple to his teacher; a smarter mother suggests that he bring a couple of aspirins. — Evan Esar
A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast. — Groucho Marx
THe world now has so many problems that if Moses had come down from Mount Sinai today, the two tablets he'd carry would be aspirin. — Robert Orben
Elizabeth Taylor's so fat she puts mayonnaise on aspirin. — Joan Rivers
If men were equally at risk from this condition - if they knew their bellies might swell as if they were suffering from end-stage cirrhosis,… — Barbara Ehrenreich
People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache,… — Karl Pilkington
I took the two most expensive aspirins in history. — Wally Pipp
I'm sick and tired of black and white people of good intent giving aspirin to a society that is dying of a cancerous disease. — Ralph Abernathy
There are no violent gangs fighting over aspirin territories. There are no violent gangs fighting over whisky territories or computer territories or anything else that's… — Harry Browne
When thereâ€™s an ache, you want to be like aspirin, not vitamins. Aspirin solves a very particular problem someone has, whereas vitamins are a general… — Reed Hastings
I must be right. Never an aspirin. Never injured a day in my life. The whole country, the whole world, should be doing my exercises.… — Joseph Pilates
Aspirin is so good for roses, brandy for sweet peas, and a squeeze of lemon-juice for the fleshy flowers, like begonias. — Gerald Durrell

Who Wrote These Aspirin Quotes

68 authors contributed a total of 70 Aspirin Quotes, led by these top contributors: