Entering a club is an insufferable two-way street and the patrons are just as guilty as the doormen. — Sean Evans Club Copy Share Image
It's amazing how quickly a defined jawline can turn your luck around. — Sean Evans Amazing Copy Share Image
People who are from Chicago are just funnier than people who aren't from Chicago. — Sean Evans Chicago Copy Share Image
The pool table, like bathroom graffiti and horrible lighting, is a dive bar staple. — Sean Evans Bar Copy Share Image
I don't have a ton of talents. I'm not this conventionally attractive TV dude. — Sean Evans Attractive Copy Share Image
Dive bars rely on a steady stream of neighborhood regulars to keep their doors open. — Sean Evans Dive Copy Share Image
Bjorn Borg has the look of a Scandanavian rock star with the understated charm of a Wes Anderson movie. — Sean Evans Charm Copy Share Image
Relative to the rest of your life, college isn't all that hard. — Sean Evans College Copy Share Image
Thanks to fantasy football and 'Madden' on Xbox Live there are legions of jersey adorning sports fanatics who think they're equipped to… — Sean Evans Fantasy Copy Share Image
When humiliation begets heartbreak, your clothing permeates with a stench of desperation that only women can smell. — Sean Evans Desperation Copy Share Image
When you consider the depths to which major college football coaches are willing to sink in order to protect their programs, Tyrann… — Sean Evans College football Copy Share Image
There's not a lot of chefs in the kitchen and very few people are involved in 'Hot Ones.' There's no research team… — Sean Evans Chefs Copy Share Image
Fraternities are bizarre because, as a pledge, some clown who wears Hollister & Co. flip-flops exclusively will make you clean his toilet… — Sean Evans Clown Copy Share Image
We've all had classes with a professor so bland and monotone that their lectures sound like Mitt Romney reading 'Paradise Lost' from… — Sean Evans Education Copy Share Image
Contending that top-level, male high school basketball players are better than WNBA all-stars, while blatantly obvious, makes us feel uncomfortable to write. — Sean Evans Ball player Copy Share Image
Award shows in general are just lame excuses to stroke the egos of millionaires, but the 'ESPY's' are an especially embarrassing example. — Sean Evans Award Copy Share Image
Increasingly, I'll see commercials and every fast food chain has the new spicy fries or spicy this or spicy that and I… — Sean Evans Fast food Copy Share Image
If I'm talking about like the evolution of 'Hot Ones,' when we first started it was not a big hit at all.… — Sean Evans Big Copy Share Image
I'm not Ryan Seacrest. If I want people to pay attention to me, I have to just eat scorching-hot food. — Sean Evans Attention Copy Share Image
If you think scrawling your Twitter handle on a bus window with a Sharpie is a worthwhile way to gain followers, your… — Sean Evans Direction Copy Share Image
If you want to be universally loved, forget a career in broadcasting. You can't compliment a team without necessarily dissing their opponent. — Sean Evans Career Copy Share Image
Celebrity is this thing that's unattainable. This unattainable lifestyle. This unattainable social status. But there's nothing more commonplace than dying from hot… — Sean Evans Celebrity Copy Share Image
It's weird, but I'm so empathetic; when I see people dying on hot sauce, I do feel for them. And I'm a… — Sean Evans Empathetic Copy Share Image
It's always annoying to me when I see Nick Cannon on a press appearance and everyone's asking about Mariah Carey. Give this… — Sean Evans Always Copy Share Image
As a general rule, girls at the gym are not interested in a free power clean lesson from some doofus in a… — Sean Evans Ensemble Copy Share Image
Preparing America's student loan crippled grads to enter a hopeless and crowded job market is no easy task, which is why we… — Sean Evans America Copy Share Image
Stadiums are notoriously bad for cell phone reception. Spending the majority of a game trying to post an Instagram'd picture of the… — Sean Evans Bad Copy Share Image
I want 'Hot Ones' to give people that warm, fuzzy, TGIF 'Family Matters' Christmas-episode feeling after they watch it. — Sean Evans Family Copy Share Image
Taking mass transit is an uphill battle and one wrong move can put you on the latest Worldstarhiphop fight compilation. — Sean Evans Battle Copy Share Image
We don't really want to be the 'Late Night' of the Internet. We want to have one foot in the mainstream, one… — Sean Evans Foot Copy Share Image
It's amazing how one introductory course in environmental science can turn a 20-year-old into an Biofuels expert. — Sean Evans Amazing Copy Share Image
If you're in public and standing still, don't take a phone call. It's that simple. All you're doing is holding those around… — Sean Evans Conversation Copy Share Image
If LeBron James, Phil Mickelson, or Reggie Bush had to rely on personality to make it in this world, they'd all be… — Sean Evans Clowns Copy Share Image
Penny Hardaway has a decided style advantage over other players because he rocked one of the crispiest jerseys in NBA history. — Sean Evans Football Copy Share Image
The sixth track on 'Days Before Rodeo' is jet fuel for the soul, the kind of song that could make a middle… — Sean Evans Coffee Copy Share Image
There's something about supposed experts making millions of dollars to bark tired sports cliches that makes our blood boil. And it should. — Sean Evans Blood Copy Share Image
We knew James Harden was good. You don't get named to All-Star games and win Olympic gold medals when you play like… — Sean Evans All-star game Copy Share Image
When you decorate with neon beer lights, it's hard to create a class divide. So, the dive bar is an institution that… — Sean Evans Beer Copy Share Image
When you're only source of income is a $20 allowance and you rely on a Razor scooter to get around, life's not… — Sean Evans Around Copy Share Image
Once you're past the age of, say, 11, you should stop idolizing athletes. You look ridiculous wearing the jersey of a guy… — Sean Evans Age Copy Share Image
