Rachel Dratch

I didn't consider myself a huge baby person. I`m not like, "Oh my god! I want to hold every baby!" And some…

— Rachel Dratch

“The moment vanity officially leaves your life is when you look down to discover an asslike configuration living where your front pockets…

— Rachel Dratch

I didn't originally intend on writing a book. I started writing during the day to feel like I was accomplishing something creative.

— Rachel Dratch

When you're starting up a show, you don't really know what direction it's going to go.

— Rachel Dratch

Everybody always asks about Jimmy Fallon. I'm sorry to say that he's very nice and there's not much bad to say about…

— Rachel Dratch

When I was little, we used to have Atari.

— Rachel Dratch

I don't really consider myself an impressionist.

— Rachel Dratch

I know a lot of girls in the comedy world who are kind of like me. I don't know where the slutty…

— Rachel Dratch

I was sort of the class-clown type, and I was also in school plays, and I always liked comedy.

— Rachel Dratch

The Yale group was doing the Harold. So by our senior year we were trying to do the Harold. Again, we had…

— Rachel Dratch

I did some acting in high school, I knew I really liked it.

— Rachel Dratch

“You’d be surprised how often we see this injury in New York,' he told me. The deli-flowers-rubber-band-eye-snap thing. Beware.”

— Rachel Dratch

But I majored in Drama, modified with Psychology.

— Rachel Dratch

The first time we put Debbie Downer on the show, I had a giggle fit that I couldn't control, and the whole…

— Rachel Dratch

When I was a kid, I was super shy.

— Rachel Dratch

And you know when I was growing up, I knew I wanted to have kids, but I knew I didn't want to…

— Rachel Dratch

“isn't telling a girl you just loooooove eating horsemeat one step away from saying you haven't lived 'til you've eaten puppy skewers?”

— Rachel Dratch

The environmental agenda seems swept under the rug a lot, and environmentalists are looked at as tree-huggers who aren't dealing with the…

— Rachel Dratch

Well, I've claimed to have seen two ghosts in a hotel room.

— Rachel Dratch

I never wanted to be that person who leaves 'SNL' and nothing happens.

— Rachel Dratch

In real life, I'm gorgeous, beautiful.

— Rachel Dratch

All I remember is the last time I played a videogame, it was Space Invaders.

— Rachel Dratch

“How did I think of that?" I wondered. I didn't feel like I had thought of it. It's a sort of flow…

— Rachel Dratch

I hate trying to analyze comedy in some deep way. If it gets laughs, it's funny.

— Rachel Dratch

If you have an impulse, not if you're going to ruin someone elses' scene, if you have an impulse of a funny…

— Rachel Dratch