“Betrayal, addiction and trauma weave a design of continually recycled wounds that create an overarching pattern of compulsive relationships.” — Patrick J. Carnes Addiction Copy Share Image
“In part this is an intimacy disorder, for as soon as she starts to recommit to the relationship, he starts distancing himself.… — Patrick J. Carnes Relationship Copy Share Image
“What moves betrayal into the realm of trauma is fear and terror. If the wound is deep enough, and the terror big… — Patrick J. Carnes Betrayal Copy Share Image
“However, sexual anorexics do have a definite profile that separates them from the larger population of those having difficulty being sexual: They… — Patrick J. Carnes Doing things Copy Share Image
“Loyalty to that which does not work, or worse, to a person who is toxic, exploitive or destructive to you, is a… — Patrick J. Carnes Loyalty Copy Share Image
“Addicts can clearly know they need to stop and cannot. Despite the consequences they continue high-risk behavior. They become so obsessed with… — Patrick J. Carnes Addiction Copy Share Image
“Deprivation draws on two convictions: (1) The deprived person does not believe that he or she is worthy or deserving of pleasure… — Patrick J. Carnes Faith Copy Share Image
“By the Middles Ages it was a sin to have sex with a child. If an adult were guilty of such a… — Patrick J. Carnes Children Copy Share Image
“They are often extremely competent people who are committed to doing things very well and have a fear of making mistakes and… — Patrick J. Carnes Doing things Copy Share Image
“It is also the soothing, medicating and nurturing that are part of betrayal bonding. Both partners are obsessed with whether she is… — Patrick J. Carnes Betrayal Copy Share Image
“We are so used to our own history, we do not see it as remarkable or out of the ordinary, whereas others… — patrick j. carnes History Copy Share Image
“In the 1980s, research on post traumatic stress disorder in Vietnam veterans was regarded as important, noble, and useful. When the same… — Patrick J. Carnes Abuse Copy Share Image
“By the nineteenth century, society had given up burning witches. Yet the sexual exploitation of children continued. In late-nineteenth-century Britain, for example,… — Patrick J. Carnes 19th century Copy Share Image
“Much energy goes into looking good and shoring up any holes that may appear in that image. This is where the pain… — Patrick J. Carnes Looking good Copy Share Image
