Men look at women's behinds and go: what an ass! Women look at men faces and go: what an ass! — Nikhil Saluja Funny Copy Share Image
WIFE, A person who sits up with you when you are sick, and puts up with you when you are not; — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
Most women are open to anything in bed if you make it clear that you are not going to get anything in… — Nikhil Saluja Feminism Copy Share Image
Spiders are nature's perverts... Why else are they found in the bathrooms? — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
It's all fun and games until someone wants something from you... — Nikhil Saluja Games Copy Share Image
My biggest problem is falling in love with those who retweet me, — Nikhil Saluja Biggest problem Copy Share Image
Sometimes you stop talking to someone because you keep telling yourself that if they wanted to talk to you, they would. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I was a kid during the height of the Cold War. If I did something wrong, my parents just accused me of… — Nikhil Saluja Cold war Copy Share Image
Forgiveness.. It Is The Wonderful Smell That A Flower Gives., When its Being Crushed..!! — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
Gay men are only good with fashion because they spend so many fucking years in the closet. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Youre probably doing something wrong if you have to give a press conference every time you masturbate. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Never masturbate to a fantasy involving anyone you might actually have to interact with. Trust me. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
When I'm not on twitter tweeting awesome fucking shit, it's cause I'm busy fishing your sis. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Thanks to Photoshop I can show all my boys the hot ugly chicks I've banged on Facebook. — Nikhil Saluja Twitter Copy Share Image
You're so boring, Even if you threw a boomerang, it wouldn't come back to you. — Nikhil Saluja Boomerang Copy Share Image
If God only gave me a clear sign... like making a large deposit in my name at a swiss bank. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
One of my coworkers has an annoying habit, He works! Makes me look bad. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Before you commit to a bad decision, write your future self a letter explaining why you are making that choice. — Nikhil Saluja Bad decision Copy Share Image
Honey, you're getting Adele. - How I told my Girl friend she's getting fat. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
Well son, your mother and I met on Twitter, then later we... NO DON'T LOOK AT HER AVI — Nikhil Saluja Mother Copy Share Image
I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. — Nikhil Saluja Funny Copy Share Image
Had the big sex talk with my son. It was a bit awkward but I learned a lot cool things about vaginas… — Nikhil Saluja Sex talk Copy Share Image
When a woman asks you to guess her age, it's like deciding whether to cut the blue, red, or green wire to… — Nikhil Saluja Age Copy Share Image
I just asked Siri to give me directions to the nearest mental institute and it redirected me to Twitter. — Nikhil Saluja Psychology Copy Share Image
Ways of Life : One who lacks the courage to start has already finished. — Nikhil Saluja Courage Copy Share Image
You are brave... when you overcome your fear and help others to do the same. — Nikhil Saluja Brave Copy Share Image
Broken hearts, love's deceit, pieces fall down to my feet. Broken promises, love's a lie, puddles form from the tears I cry. — Nikhil Saluja Broken hearts Copy Share Image
Lazy rule: If opportunity doesn't knock on the door today, lay down and wait for him to pass by the next day. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Twitter is like life. Sometimes, you have to pretend like you care about some people. — Nikhil Saluja Life Copy Share Image
Admit it, once in your life, youve tried to guess someones password & .. you failed. — Nikhil Saluja Life Copy Share Image
Nothing boosts my ego like seeing someone steal my tweet. Please continue doing that. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
History is full of strong, imposing women. Well, my internet history is anyway. — Nikhil Saluja History Copy Share Image
WIFE, The one person who in an argument, if you win -- you lose; — Nikhil Saluja Argument Copy Share Image
If she didn't reply to any of your 20 texts, she probably doesn't have good cell service. Definitely don't stop texting her. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'm happy I didn't belong to generation when people used gun powder to grow guns. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
Friends we can't all be amazing and talented at the same time. I mean, except me. — Nikhil Saluja Friends Copy Share Image
Men with pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They have both experienced pain and bought jewelry! — Nikhil Saluja Marriage Copy Share Image
Failure doesnt mean you have been disgraced¦¦ it does mean you were willing to try! — Nikhil Saluja Failure Copy Share Image
When a woman tells me they're Gods gift to men, I say bullshit, the wooden back scratcher is! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
