All Augusten Burroughs Quotes
- ...handsome people are always interesting to watch. But a handsome person in crisis is riveting. Always Interesting
- It’s a wonder I’m even alive. Sometimes I think that. I think that I can’t believe I haven’t killed myself. But there’s something in me… Alive
- Like every child, I adored her. Until I formed a brain and got to know her. Adored
- You deserve to need me, not to have me. Deserve
- What police officer would dare ticket Death's minivan? Dare
- The only other people who have had experiences similar to those of this man were locked up inside institutions for the criminally insane. The difference… Business
- The most I would do was use the shadow tool in Photoshop to bring out the muscular rips in my stomach, which were honestly there.… Beneath
- Everybody in recovery smokes. If you don't like smoking, don't even bother trying to get sober. Just stay drunk. Bother
- Throwing things horrified me. I suffered extreme, paralyzing anxiety when it came to anything remotely athletic. I wouldn't even run to catch the school bus… Anxiety
- As I sat in the hot, salty water, I thought, 'No wonder Mr. Bubble always gives me a urinary tract infection and hives.' Mr. Bubble… Always Gives
- Some damage is too severe, some harm endures. And what you have to do is accept it. And by accept it I mean, don’t be… Accept
- I think I love him, but I also think that you can love people who aren't good for you. Good
- I think part of the reason I'm attracted to Foster is because he's such a mess. I mean, the people I have loved in my… Accustomed
- Part of me believes that love is more valuable when you have to work for it. Believe
- (The new boyfriend) knows I write every day for hours but has no idea that all I’m writing about is me. It seems wiser to… Alcoholic
- I was struck with a bolt of distilled horror like I have never known before. Far worse than suddenly finding yourself walking through a prison… Bolt
- Thanksgiving was nothing more than a pilgrim-created obstacle in the way of Christmas; a dead bird in the street that forced a brief detour. Bird
- Glen had a disability more disfiguring than a burn and more terrifying than cancer. Glen had been born on the day after Christmas. "My parents… All
- Nobody's trying to kill you, Deirdre. You're killing yourself. Deirdre
- The most mortifying fact of my life is something that happened when I was fourteen and I have never admitted to anyone: not to friends… Admitted
- After I got my coffee, I leaned against a stop sign and sipped, pretending it was a normal day and I was only up this… Been
- It was unnerving, the way she could go from cool efficiency to sarcastic to sweet within the space of thirty seconds. I found it very… Constantly
- But even with my minimal amount of fame, there are certain perks. Recently, I was at a movie premier, and at the party after the… Absolutely
- I was learning that if I lived slightly in the future-what will happen next-I didn't have to feel so much about what was going on… Feel
- Our lives are one endless stretch of misery punctuated by processed fast foods and the occasional crisis or amusing curiosity. Amusing