All Ambrose Bierce Quotes
- IGNORAMUS, n. A person unacquainted with certain kinds of knowledge familiar to yourself, and having certain other kinds that you know nothing about. Certain
- CONSOLATION, n. The knowledge that a better man is more unfortunate than yourself. Better
- PHRENOLOGY, n. The science of picking the pocket through the scalp. It consists in locating and exploiting the organ that one is a dupe with. Consists
- ORTHOGRAPHY, n. The science of spelling by the eye instead of the ear. Ear
- HOMOEOPATHY, n. A school of medicine midway between Allopathy and Christian Science. To the last both the others are distinctly inferior, for Christian Science will… Both
- SYCOPHANT- One who approaches Greatness on his belly so that he may not be commanded to turn and be kicked. He is sometimes an editor. Approach
- PIRACY, n. Commerce without its folly-swaddles, just as God made it. Commerce
- FORCE, n. "Force is but might," the teacher said p/ "That definition's just."/ The boy said naught but throught instead,/ Remembering his pounded head:/ "Force… Boy
- DECALOGUE, n. A series of commandments, ten in number - just enough to permit an intelligent selection for observance, but not enough to embarrass the… Choice
- POETRY, n. A form of expression peculiar to the Land beyond the Magazines. Beyond
- WAR, n. A by-product of the arts of peace. The most menacing political condition is a period of international amity. Amity
- INGRATE, n. One who receives a benefit from another, or is otherwise an object of charity. Benefit
- VITUPERATION, n. Saite, as understood by dunces and all such as suffer from an impediment in their wit. All
- INTERPRETER, n. One who enables two persons of different languages to understand each other by repeating to each what it would have been to the… Advantage
- PALM, n. A species of tree . . . of which the familiar "itching palm" ("Palma hominis") is most widely distributed . . . .… Applying
- Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box. Ballot
- WEATHER, n. The climate of an hour. A permanent topic of conversation among persons whom it does not interest, but who have inherited the tendency… Accessible
- Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it. Amuck
- ENOUGH, pro. All there is in the world if you like it. All
- DELUGE, n. A notable first experiment in baptism which washed away the sins (and sinners) of the world. Baptism
- RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character. Assassins
- IMPALE, v.t. In popular usage, to pierce with any weapon which remains fixed in the wound . . . . properly, to put to death… Any
- UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility. Certain
- RIGHTEOUSNESS, n. A sturdy virtue that was once found among the Pantidoodles inhabiting the lower part of the peninsula of Oque. Some feeble attempts were… Among
- MONAD, n. The ultimate, indivisible unit of matter (see Molecule). The monad has body without bulk, and mind without manifestation - containing all the powers… All