All Al Franken Quotes
- At 'SNL,' I wrote political stuff, but I never felt the show should have an axe to grind. But when I left in '95, I… Axe
- Bill Clinton is the greatest president of the 20th century because I played touch football with him. Bill
- Bob Dole used to be really funny. Barney Frank can be kind of funny. Bob Kerrey has a good sense of humor. Barney
- Demagoguery sells. And therefore, radio stations will put it on. But that doesn't mean that you can't do something else and also make it sell. Demagoguery
- Gary Bauer is a very good - he's a good friend of mine. Bauer
- Having an actual income can expand your romantic horizons toward the more appealing end of the spectrum. Actual
- Humor and seriousness are not in opposition to each other. Each
- I ask the American people not to fall victim to disinformation. There are no death panels. The Affordable Care Act cuts the deficit. Act
- I believe in not attacking a country pre-emptively unless you're sure of what you're doing and you're working with allies. Allies
- I believe people have a right to know what's going on with their information and how it's collected, how it's stored and who gets it. Believe
- I couldn't think of anything less appealing than molding the minds of tomorrow's leaders. Anything Less
- I do have a self-censor; everybody does, or at least most who are not pathological do. Censor
- I don't know how many of you have been to New York, but if a building is two blocks away from anything, you can't see… Been
- I don't know what happens to you after you die. I'm not banking on there being, like, a heaven. Banking
- I get satisfaction when I write something I like, when I'm happy with it. Get Satisfaction
- I grew up in Minnesota, where we treasure our tradition of civic engagement - and our record of having the nation's highest voter participation. Civic
- I hope you realize, in a democracy, laughter is assent. Assent
- I just can't sit still and meditate; that doesn't kind of work for me. I don't even know exactly what it means. Even Know
- I know I have an awful lot to learn from the people of Minnesota. Awful
- I think that the default for collecting any kind of personal data should be opt-in consent. Any
- I think the government has a role in protecting the fundamental rights of its citizens. Citizens
- I want to reclaim 'liberal.' I'm a liberal, and I think most Americans are liberals. American
- I'm a bit of a shill for the Clinton Administration, which has its perks. I'm invited to all the inaugural balls. Administration
- I'm crushed by the responsibility of writing a satirical book. Book
- I'm for Israel's right to exist. Exist