Twitter Quotes by Nikhil Saluja · Page 22

MARRIAGE, Is only compatible when the man makes a living and his wife makes living worthwhile;

— Nikhil Saluja

Never lend a book to someone who don't know how to read, never give your heart to someone that don't know how…

— Nikhil Saluja

LOVE, A situation which happens when you think almost as much of another as you do of yourself;

— Nikhil Saluja

If opportunity had a twitter account, it's not going to be knocking on anyone's door anytime soon.

— Nikhil Saluja

I feel the tears slowly rolling down my eyes and suddenly the tears wont stop.

— Nikhil Saluja

If you can't be the reason behind her smile, at least be the reason she walks funny for a while!

— Nikhil Saluja

Facts are meaningless - you could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!

— Nikhil Saluja

He'll never be better than he is on the first date. Unless he's rich and hasn't told you yet.

— Nikhil Saluja

I'm well aware when i've to use suck me or fuck me. Yea I'm classy like that!

— Nikhil Saluja

I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones who do.

— Nikhil Saluja

Love makes the world go round, but alcohol makes it go round twice as fast.

— Nikhil Saluja

Twitter should do something about the people who don't no how to spell.

— Nikhil Saluja

I typed the word Google into Google. Guess what came up? Everything.

— Nikhil Saluja

I feel like I'm a cockroach when I'm sleeping on my back trying to get up

— Nikhil Saluja

Please be safe everyone. I'll unfollow and block you if you die tonight.

— Nikhil Saluja

Girl's Life Lesson 1: Crying confuses men. They get uncomfortable and will do anything to get it to stop. Take advantage.

— Nikhil Saluja

There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils.

— Nikhil Saluja

I don't understand how girls could be so in love with a guy one week and the next not even talk to…

— Nikhil Saluja

They named it Twitter because Licking each other dirty asses was too long.

— Nikhil Saluja

Why don't blind people sky dive? Because it scares the hell out of their dogs!

— Nikhil Saluja

Everyone has a life story. Mine will probably end with something like then he found twitter.

— Nikhil Saluja

Regarding the Boy Scouts, I'm very suspicious of any organization that has a handbook.

— Nikhil Saluja

It's so weird to think that before Twitter, all of this nonsense just stayed in people's heads.

— Nikhil Saluja

HUSBAND, SMART, A man who is never so busy bringing home the bacon that he forgets the applesauce;

— Nikhil Saluja

I'm entirely made of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.

— Nikhil Saluja

Almost all serial killers are men. That's 'cause women like to kill one man slowly over many, many years.

— Nikhil Saluja

Every night when everyone's asleep, I grab my phone and I start reading all our old conversations.

— Nikhil Saluja

You know the acronym behind your name won't keep me from kicking your ass in the parking lot.

— Nikhil Saluja

Why do dogs love their daily walks? They get to check their p-mail!

— Nikhil Saluja

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are politicians or celebrities.

— Nikhil Saluja

I have a computer, a vibrator, & pizza delivery. Why should I leave the house?

— Nikhil Saluja

A detective on the drug detail developed seizures. He is a narcoleptic.

— Nikhil Saluja

The best thing about this tweet is, by the time you found it's completely worthless, it's too late for you to stop…

— Nikhil Saluja

LOVE, A strange feeling that comes over a man -- when he keeps wanting to call a girl by his last name;

— Nikhil Saluja

If I followed you back after 15 minutes of following me, I was just pretending to be busy & I failed.

— Nikhil Saluja

If you like internet jokes, you should see my online bank account.

— Nikhil Saluja

You are the Powerful person only when., your Presence can decrease or increase someones Heartbeat.!!!

— Nikhil Saluja

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the Hell Happened to your bra and panties.

— Nikhil Saluja

If your daily twitter mission isn't to get 10 or more unfollows we can't be friends.

— Nikhil Saluja

Instagram: Because even ugly & fat girls wanna feel like models sometimes.

— Nikhil Saluja