When a girl says have fun She means have a horrible time without me. Not true... Maybe! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I've never killed an unfollower but I should definitely take a shot at it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
WIFE, A great comfort during her husband's troubles -- those, that as a bachelor, he would never have had; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'd be a great mattress salesman coz I love removing pants for no reason and spending all day looking at porn. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sign in a vegetarian restaurant: All we are saying is give peas a chance. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The blonde raced across the cookie package because the instructions said, Tear along dotted line. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
In my version of volleyball I use my legs and also don't play volleyball. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Son, a woman is a lot like a... a refrigerator! They're about six feet tall, 300 pounds. They make ice, and... um...… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The next time someone gets in my face to fight, I'll show them pictures on my phone of an ant I once… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, Something that changes the demeanour of a driver -- there is no longer any effort needed to keep both hands on… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are Tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
On my phone google search box looks the same as twitter box. If you find me tweeting something like sleeping incest sex… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I heard you say a prayer, and I knew that there is a God I could… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When you mess up a guy's hair, he thinks it's cute. But when you mess up a GIRL'S hair... I hope you… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Experience is the key to not making same mistakes again, whatever mistakes you've made is part of building you to understand life… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Do girls really look at penises and say Wow, I can't wait to put that in my mouth? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
