“I can’t handle this, I thought immediately. . . . without Adderall. My addiction finished the thought for me.” — Cat Marnell Addiction Copy Share Image
“No one can make you feel anything you don’t want to feel,” my mother told me once, a complete delusion. He” — Cat Marnell Parenting Copy Share Image
“NOW THAT I WAS OUT of that bizarre . . . sobriety fog, I could see everything much more clearly!” — Cat Marnell Sobriety Copy Share Image
“We would’ve been kicked out if we got caught—and you know me. I just live for getting kicked out of things.” — Cat Marnell Caught Copy Share Image
“I peed and washed my hands—these are the details you need to know—and” — Cat Marnell Hands Copy Share Image
“And so I shut down. Winter raged on, but I stopped thinking about my pregnancy. I pretended it all wasn’t happening.” — Cat Marnell Stopped Copy Share Image
“But you know what they say: mo’ prescriptions, mo’ problems.” — Cat Marnell Prescriptions Copy Share Image
“What can I say? Big pharma isn’t lying to you (fine, they probably are): performance-enhancing drugs deliver, babes. In the short term,… — Cat Marnell Copy Share Image
“Here’s a life lesson for you kids: it’s much easier to go through something upsetting when you’re on drugs. The more intense… — Cat Marnell Life Copy Share Image
“PEOPLE DON’T JUST CHANGE OVERNIGHT, do they? But Marco did: from a sweet boy into a fearsome predator, a bully, a thief.” — Cat Marnell Change Copy Share Image
“It went so dark inside of me. And it was dark outside, too, in those miserable after-Christmas months: cold and wet and… — Cat Marnell Christmas Copy Share Image
“But eventually I gave up: on sleeping, on self-control, on my career, on myself. I gave up on all of it. I… — Cat Marnell Discipline Copy Share Image
“So I was always practically falling out of my desk chair. (Stimulants make the nerves a bit . . . jangly, you know. Especially at… — Cat Marnell Falling Copy Share Image
“Then I’d go pee into a cup—or at least try to. Stupid drug tests! I’ve been taking them for nearly a decade… — Cat Marnell Shark Tank Copy Share Image
“So. I was very fortunate to get to go to Silver Hill and be in the Transitional Living program. So many sick… — Cat Marnell Luxury Rehabs Copy Share Image
“I listed my triggers (carrot cake, deadlines, weight gain, mice, insomnia), studied relapse prevention, and learned dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) skills, which… — Cat Marnell Mental health Copy Share Image
“I will repeat the only advice which has ever really resonated with me re: pain—emotional as well as physical—which is: It’s not… — Cat Marnell Copy Share Image
“Why are you in my room? Can you give me some fucking privacy? You can’t just bust in on people!” I knew… — Cat Marnell Cybersecurity Copy Share Image
“We’d talk a little and he’d spot me the fifteen pills to get through the week. As soon as I got my… — Cat Marnell Copy Share Image
“it. No more. I kept scribbling down “rules” as they came to me: NO HARD DRUGS. Ooh, wasn’t it fun counting these… — Cat Marnell Pills Copy Share Image
“Worst of all, I couldn’t find my Xanax or my Ambien. I shook out the sheets; I dug through the piles. Finally,… — Cat Marnell Copy Share Image
“I would have swallowed arsenic if someone had promised that it would put me under for at least a few hours—that’s how… — Cat Marnell Sleep Copy Share Image
“It was great not having a roommate. I didn’t have to turn the lights off and go to bed, like, ever. I… — Cat Marnell Homework Copy Share Image
“My parents were quiet in the car to the airport, but I couldn’t escape the voices in my head. You failure. You… — Cat Marnell Parenting Copy Share Image
“I thought about this. “Young female bodies are built to get pregnant, you know,” I said coolly. I was still gazing up… — Cat Marnell Time Copy Share Image
“I WAS LIKE . . . LIKE A GROUPIE FOR ALL OF THESE DOWNTOWN GUYS . . . I WAS—I AM—BULIMIC AND OBSESSED WITH MY LOOKS . . . I THOUGHT… — Cat Marnell Bulimic Copy Share Image
“Sure, it could have been worse—but, to quote Keith Richards on the end of his relationship with Anita Pallenberg: “It could have… — Cat Marnell Keith richards Copy Share Image
