George Burns, what a man. He read in the paper that it takes ten dollars a year to support a kid in… — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Noah's wife, who said to him after 40 days and 40 nights, It's your turn to spread the papers on the floor!… — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Ponce de Leon, who said when he discovered the Fountain of Youth, Where the hell are the paper cups? Never got a… — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Sonny Von Bulow, who said to her husband Claus on their honeymoon, Stop needling me. Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Dolly Parton, who said to her doctor, Are you sure it's a chest cold? Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Adam, who said to our Lord in the Garden of Eden, I got more ribs - you got more broads? Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Joe Torre, who switched to first base because he didn't want to go through life as Chicken Catcher Torre. Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Eve said to the serpent, “You know I could go for a bite to eat, but I don't know you from Adam.” — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Goliath's mother, who said to Goliath, Stop running around with David! You're always coming home stoned! Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Simon Peter, who embarrassed the other disciples at the Last Supper by asking for seconds. Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Jacques Cousteau, the last man to see Jimmy Hoffa. Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
