“It suddenly occurred to me that, after all that frolicking in the meadows, he hadn't kissed me. Was it because of the… — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“As soon as we were inside, Edwart's family rushed to greet me. What seemed like thirty people circled me, chattering away. "Oh… — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“I want to leave all my friends and the sunlight for a small, rainy town.” — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“So all this time you thought I was a vampire? ' Edwart whispered furiously, pulling me a few inches to the left.… — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“Listen' he whispered ferociously, like a ferocious breeze or a very gentle hurricane.” — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“I balked. Another vampire? I guess it made sense; the states of the Pacific Northwest were known for their lenient monster laws.” — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“You should have seen the costumes for the last few prom themes: Pimps and their srteet ho's; CEOs and their office ho's;… — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“Germs contagious, contagious alert! But Edwart and Purell are stronger than dirt!” — Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“I had a dejected, brooding expression on my face, and I could tell from the reflection in the window that it was… — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“Then, suddenly, I remembered the accident, and Edwart's snow-proof body, and his eyes that changed from I-don't-remember to green, and I knew.” — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
“I noticed there was garlic above the doorframe. Edwart held a stake in one hand and a 'Team Jacob' shirt in the… — The Harvard Lampoon Copy Share Image
