I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is French-kiss her. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
There are three rings involved with marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
What was the scandal? I fell in love with this girl, married her. We have been married for almost 15 years now. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
For the first year of marriage I had basically a bad attitude. I tended to place my wife underneath a pedestal. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in my bath and she'd come in and sink my boats.” — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I should have known something was wrong with my first wife. When I brought her home to meet my parents, they approved… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
What I do know about physics is that to a man standing on the shore, time passes quicker than to a man… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Should I marry W? Not if she won't tell me the other letters in her name. And what about her career? How… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
For God sakes, this is a woman I was married to for 10 years. We made love. I'd hold her head over… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
If you pursue the other woman, it's a losing situation and it's not good for your relationship or your marriage. If your… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
You can be with your wife, very happily married, and then you meet some woman and you love her. But you love… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I've had bad luck in my two previous marriages. The first wife left me, and the second did not. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“The only time that my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers.” — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I'm very old-fashioned. I believe that people should stay married for life, like pigeons and Catholics. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“True, science has conquered many diseases, broken the genetic code, and even placed human beings on the moon, and yet when a man of… — Woody Allen Copy Share
In every generation there are a few people who are authentically funny. The cosmetics change. You may not be able to articulate it, and… — Woody Allen Copy Share
I think Frank Capra was a much craftier filmmaker, a wonderful filmmaker. He had enormous technique, and he knew how to manipulate the public… — Woody Allen Copy Share
Gauguin flew into a frenzy! He held my head under the X-ray machine for ten straight minutes and for several hours after I could… — Woody Allen Copy Share
I enjoy the making of the film and it's something for me to do. If nobody ever comes to my films, if people don't… — Woody Allen Copy Share
Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage. — Woody Allen Copy Share
A stockbroker is someone who invests other people's money until it is all gone. — Woody Allen Copy Share
There are two important things in the world, the first is sex. The other isn't all that important. — Woody Allen Copy Share
