If you were born in September, it's pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a bang. Today's… — Kevin Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when... You hear a joke in someone else's conversation & accidentally laugh. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law? — Dick Clark Copy Share Image
“Is a joke truly funny when we laugh at it, or is it merely some aberration of our frontal lobe?” — Gerald Schroeder Copy Share Image
A Whoopee cushion filled with gravy adds a hilarious new dimension to a rather tiresome practical joke — Thegr81 Copy Share Image
“Don't let your teeth make you lose respect by permanently keeping them opened for the sake of being friendly.” — Michael Bassey Johnson Copy Share Image
When you look at the average American you realize there's nothing nature enjoys more than a good joke. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
We like to joke that India has sick companies but rich promoters. Yet, even after the bad loans and non-payment of dues… — Sucheta Dalal Copy Share Image
I don't feel any pressure to joke about #MeToo - in fact, I'd say you shouldn't, because it's a great movement that… — Joel McHale Copy Share Image
When I do jokes that maybe are seen as social commentary, I research them to the nth degree. I probably do more… — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
I always think any circumstances can be funny. Not that I'm irresponsible, but when things go wrong, I always come up with… — Brian Helgeland Copy Share Image
I was contacted through MySpace to come and jam out for Michael Jackson. I thought it was a joke. I forwarded it… — Orianthi Copy Share Image
I was drawn to it much to my father's dismay. He wanted me to be a pianist like he was, but I… — Miguel Ferrer Copy Share Image
Whenever I perform, people get me because I'm talking about things that people can identify with and relate to. I'm not just… — Tracy Morgan Copy Share Image
I know what is funny coming out of my mouth and what is not funny coming out of my mouth. You have… — Kumail Nanjiani Copy Share Image
“I think my heart is defective," Jillian says. I have to force myself to smile Jan looks at me. I get the… — Heather Hepler Copy Share Image
I am so pathetic with machines in real life, it's not a joke. I'd rather walk, or even run, than take the… — Bipasha Basu Copy Share Image
“Your ass is flapping in the breeze,” Maddox warned with what felt like his first real laugh since this whole thing started.… — Annabeth Albert Copy Share Image
“Perhaps I can make you understand. Let’s start from the beginning. A man is hired to give advice to the readers of… — Nathanael West Copy Share Image
I have never fit into this town, this marriage, this skin. I am the child who was picked last to play tag;… — Jodi Picoult Copy Share Image
I think a joke is a form of truth-telling. A good joke that's absurd contains elements of our daily darkness and also… — Colson Whitehead Copy Share Image
When I was a kid and getting paid to stand in front of a camera. I used to spend a lot of… — Sterling Hayden Copy Share Image
“I heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Life seems harsh, and cruel. Says he feels all alone in… — Alan Moore Copy Share Image
There is a big old joke around the 'Loose Women' team that I never shave my legs. — Stacey Solomon Copy Share Image
A lot of the comedians don't even tell the joke. Like only three tell the joke, the rest of them dissect it. — Bob Saget Copy Share Image
Laughter is the only tenable attitude in a universe which is a joke played on itself. — Peter J. Carroll Copy Share Image
“Asia is an entertainment, Europe is a dream, America is an imprisonment and Rest is a nightmare.” — Santosh Kalwar Copy Share Image
Talk shit bitch, I don't give a fuck. You ain't nothin but a joke, we're laughing at you. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
We don't apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get it, then… — Joan Rivers Copy Share Image
“You cant laugh at a joke agian and agian, but why do you keep crying over the same thing over and over… — Monika Ramzy Copy Share Image
Failure and unhappiness is easier because you can make a joke out of it. — David Nicholls Copy Share Image
If you manage to joke around and charm people, it means that from inside, you are very serious. — Rajpal Yadav Copy Share Image
There's a joke in my family that I'm going to make a career out of playing other people's younger selves. — Ella Purnell Copy Share Image
I have a file of four million jokes... I have them cross-indexed. Whatever subject you want, I have a joke on it. — Milton Berle Copy Share Image
Westminster is no joke. I took some tough classes there. It prepared me for a tough career. — Brooke Baldwin Copy Share Image
I don't mind being the butt of the joke... It doesn't really bother me. I quite enjoy it. — Ryan Seacrest Copy Share Image
Make it dark, make it grim, make it tough, but then, for the love of God, tell a joke. — Joss Whedon Copy Share Image
Men love a joke - on the other fellow. But your really humorous woman loves a joke on herself. — Mary Roberts Rinehart Copy Share Image
People always ask us, 'Hey, is there going to be a 'Beerfest 2'?' I don't know if I have another beer joke… — Jay Chandrasekhar Copy Share Image
