Is it okay to go the roof of the tallest building in your town and jerk off into the street? — Eugene Mirman Copy Share Image
All this could be part of a plan. There is no way an atheist can prove it’s not. But it’s some plan,… — Christopher Hitchens Copy Share Image
Everybody calls me fat all the time, so I can’t wait to have a reason, instead of everybody just being a jerk!… — Kelly Clark Copy Share Image
Squatting on old bones and excrement and rusty iron, in a white blaze of heat, a panorama of naked idiots stretches to… — William S. Burroughs Copy Share Image
What if there's another terrorist attack? I cringe at the ideas of our enemies watching this, knowing much like the president we… — John McCain Copy Share Image
I love how New York is so multicultural. I wish I was ethnic, I'm nothing. Because if you're Hispanic and you get… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
The mere mention of the Farakka Express, which jerks its way eastward each day from Delhi to Calcutta, is enough to throw… — Tahir Shah Copy Share Image
Let the jerks of the world serve as the perfect example of what you don't want to be. You'll be a heck… — Willie Nelson Copy Share Image
When you've been hurt, you don't make excuses for the jerk who hurt you. That's his mama's job. — Catherine Anderson Copy Share Image
A jerk will keep hurting you then apologize to keep you from leaving them, and then do it all over again. Dont… — Sonya Parker Copy Share Image
“If you fall in love with jerk, don't you just reject him. He may reveal the jerk part of you which concealed.” — Toba Beta Copy Share Image
People think: 'If this photographer's looking like a big jerk-off, maybe it's okay if I do.' I like to catch my subjects… — Mick Rock Copy Share Image
I think my new thing will be to try to be a real happy guy. I'll just walk around being real happy… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
It's tough being an actor making music, because even I have a knee-jerk reaction to that. — John Hawkes Copy Share Image
“I was sitting watching President Obama at the dangerous DeSoto Solar Farm and thinking: He is either very gullible or he is… — Steven Magee Copy Share Image
I want to be a jerk like the rest of my friends, and have fun, and not care about the consequences, but… — Leonardo DiCaprio Copy Share Image
“Just because someone's a member of an ethnic minority doesn't mean they're not a nasty small-minded little jerk.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
The way Disney characters move, they're very kind of slow and fluid and flowing; one pose kind of eases into the next.… — Seth MacFarlane Copy Share Image
I have a big ego, and I'm a confident person, but when it comes down to being a jerk, that doesn't work… — Harry Connick, Jr Copy Share Image
Sometimes people change their minds, sometimes they meet someone else, sometimes they get sober, and sometimes he was just a jerk who… — Greg Behrendt Copy Share Image
