The best types of laughter: 1) Laughing so hard it becomes silent. 2) You feel a six pack coming on. 3) Tears… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“The big one was at least cute, and as annoying as she was, you couldn't get mad at a golden retriever.” — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
“Unaware that he is only interested in the presumed parched pucker in her pants, she is more than happy to give him… — Curtis Ackie Copy Share Image
“Nasil and Owen transport organs for transplant these days—and deliver takeout." "I hope they don't get those mixed up.” — Jasper Fforde Copy Share Image
Comedy is my first love; that's my main goal in life - to keep doing comedy. — Lauren Lapkus Copy Share Image
“There's a time and a place for everything.”...Yes. This is my time and you are in my place.” — Poppet Copy Share Image
“Smartass Disciple: How the hell do we find the truth ? Master of Stupidity: Just seek it with hope it’ll find you.” — Toba Beta Copy Share Image
Donald Trump announced today he is running for president of the United States. Traditionally that means six more weeks of comedy. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
There's something quite joyful about doing comedy which doesn't really need much analysis. I'm not elitist. I like to do crowd-pleasing stuff… — Steve Coogan Copy Share Image
“There's something to be said about drinking a carafe of wine by yourself ... I just can't remember at the moment what… — Gerard de Marigny Copy Share Image
Well yesterday I was shooting hoops with my friends then we just started goofing off when we tried to shoot so I… — Michael Country Copy Share Image
“Coincidentally, a good age for a Japanese girl is younger than twenty five, because that's when she turns into a 'Christmas Cake'.… — Andrew Davidson Copy Share Image
The comedy community is fairly supportive of human beings in general. There are some things you can teach with comedy that people… — Colin Mochrie Copy Share Image
“He held out his hand to Sophie, just like Mrs. Pentstemmon, but a little less royally. Sophie levered herself up, wondering if… — Diana Wynne Jones Copy Share Image
“Within the magical community, most brides are virgins. Do you have any idea how many curses and other horrible things are associated… — Elizabeth A. Reeves Copy Share Image
“As the late neurologist Max Levin theorized: "If play were not pleasurable, kittens would never chase each other's tails, and so would… — John Pollack Copy Share Image
With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke. — Will Rogers Copy Share Image
A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it. — George Bernard Shaw Copy Share Image
“I had a dream about you last night.. you were holding a pine cone and introducing him as Gerald.” — Nicole McKay Copy Share Image
I fell in love with your smile, and your humor. I fell in love with everything about you. And maybe, one day,… — Leslie Copy Share Image
I cant imagine getting bored with comedy or thinking comedy is beneath us suddenly. — Robert Webb Copy Share Image
Turning on the TV: 10% to watch shows and 90% to use it as background noise. Just so I feel less lonely… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“In life there are squares and there are circles, sometimes it's best to be an oblong” — Benny Bellamacina Copy Share Image
'Mad TV' is one of my most favorite shows of all time and is a huge part of my obsession with sketch… — Shane Dawson Copy Share Image
“Comamandering is not a word. It has letters, doesn't it? Sounds like a word to me.” — Tahereh Mafi Copy Share Image
I learned early on that in the real world, the masks of tragedy and comedy adorn the proscenium of every life. — Walter Cronkite Copy Share Image
Gross things sound funny and set people up to listen to something a little uninviting. — Brian Chippendale Copy Share Image
Sometimes you can take those dramatic roles and maybe interject a little humor into them, and I think the reverse also works. — Dennis Farina Copy Share Image
“I WAS NOT EXPECTING A NAC MAC FEEGLE TODAY, said Death. OTHERWISE I WOULD HAVE WORN PROTECTIVE CLOTHING, HA HA.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“You were sleeping?" said Princess One. "No," I said. "Sometimes I just like to lie in the dark for hours with my… — Melissa Kantor Copy Share Image
As soon as I realized you could be funny as a job, that was the job I wanted. — Seth Rogen Copy Share Image
“My brain works perfectly," she says. "I see a disgusting human being and it says die.” — Becca Ritchie & Kristia Ritchie Copy Share Image
I would like to help young women writing comedy, acting, anything like that. — Rachel Sennott Copy Share Image
Great,' I said. 'Visit exotic Australia. Get bitten by an exotic snake. Die exotically. — Steven Gould Copy Share Image
“Some people obsess about prolonging their life, but there are many who have lived long enough to have learned one can live… — George Hammond Copy Share Image
“A tiger only needs three things to be comfortable. Lots of food, sleep, and…actually, no it’s just those two things.” — Colleen Houck Copy Share Image
You know Death will get you in the end, but if you are smart and have a sense of humor, you can… — Jimmy Buffett Copy Share Image
I loved comedy, but I never saw myself as a sitcom guy. I envisioned myself doing an hour drama or doing movies. — Kevin Rahm Copy Share Image
I feel like any time John Oliver is added to something, the comedy is instantly there. He's so funny. — Alison Brie Copy Share Image
When I started with the comedy me and my wife never thought that it would pay the mortgage. It was just something… — Lee Evans Copy Share Image
