“You’re not behind—you’re just living your own story. Stop chasing someone else’s timeline and start trusting your own pace.” — Felecia Etienne Copy Share Image
“When someone genuinely laughs with you, it’s proof that you share a certain internal space. And that’s not so lonely after all.” — Gina Barreca Copy Share Image
If you thought it was impossible for a film to contain less effective comedy than Date Movie, here's evidence to the contrary. — James Berardinelli Copy Share Image
I'm scared to have children because I can't imagine creating something more needy than myself. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Are you okay? You seem ...soggy." "Soggy?" "Yes." Heather nodded. "Like you're a depressed spaghetti noodle or something.” — Chelsea Fine Copy Share Image
Kittens play with yarn, they bat it around. What they're really doing is saying, "I can't knit, get this away from me!" — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
However spontaneous it seems, laughter always implies a kind of secret freemasonry, or even complicity, with other laughers, real or imaginary. — Henri Bergson Copy Share Image
My type of humor is me not caring whether people know what I'm talking about or not. — John Hodgman Copy Share Image
When I give a speech at a corporate event, I often ask those in attendance, 'Do you know how to tell if… — Bill Walsh Copy Share Image
“Contestants, whether it be for an army or a posse, we must be strong. We must face our fears, if only to… — Gitty Daneshvari Copy Share Image
When I finally embraced abstinence it was because of the simple urge to work a longer day. Thus, without joining Alcoholics Anonymous,… — Clive James Copy Share Image
Not everybody, however, has a genuine sense of humor. That calls for an altruistic detachment from oneself and a mysterious sympathy with… — Karl Rahner Copy Share Image
It's weird with stand-up comedy. It doesn't really translate worldwide. I want to figure out how do I make it worldwide. Do… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I call it a comedy film, but I feel that is because 'Sholay' is a complete film. It is the best in… — Rajpal Yadav Copy Share Image
“Bad weather’s moving in,” the old bird said, finally handing me a check. Never seen so many tornadoes in my life. We… — Nick Wilgus Copy Share Image
“somewhere deep inside you realize that the dream has taken a hit. It hasn’t died, of course. But it has been dialed… — Michael Hyatt Copy Share Image
Get well cards have become so humorous that if you don't get sick you're missing half the fun. — Flip Wilson Copy Share Image
“I was accused of always acting superior. Always means being, not acting.” — Brian Spellman Copy Share Image
There’s always an article coming out, saying, ‘The new thing is funny women!’ — Lena Dunham Copy Share Image
New York City gritty committee pity the fool that act shitty in the midst of the calm, the witty. — Pharoahe Monch Copy Share Image
“Strange, her horoscope hadn't mentioned to beware of crazy kidnappers or demented desert sheikhs this week.” — Lora Leigh Copy Share Image
I was in the Air Force and was a boom operator (in-flight refueling). I got my comedy start in the Air Force. — Sinbad Copy Share Image
Hopefully people will be reinventing comedy forever and ever. This is just what I do, and it's a type of comedy. — David Cross Copy Share Image
“Laughter is illusion… But THE BIGGEST ONE, which you can ever encounter in your life.” — Deyth Banger Copy Share Image
Money can't buy happiness, but it's a lot more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The waltz is a very important part of my life. It's a very important way for me to express my positiveness, bringing… — Andre Rieu Copy Share Image
I just love action movies. People are like, 'What comedy movies did you grow up watching?' And I'm like, 'Not many.' — Thomas Middleditch Copy Share Image
“Life is a game that the universe plays with itself. Pick whatever winning conditions you like.” — Chuck Whelon Copy Share Image
I think that certain things are funny and certain things are okay to make fun of - including myself. — Mila Kunis Copy Share Image
“The red tongues that went licking up my heap of wood were an altogether new and strange thing to Weena.” — H.G. Wells Copy Share Image
Never say a humorous thing to a man who does not possess humour: he will always use it in evidence against you. — Herbert Beerbohm Tree Copy Share Image
The Australian fans are really friendly and personable; the sense of humour is a lot less dry than the English. — Tom Hopper Copy Share Image
If it’s zero degrees outside today and it’s supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be? — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
“The other day I was trying to enjoy the sunset of my mind when I realized we were on daylight saving time!!” — Neil Leckman, Wurms Copy Share Image
“Jersey Shore has killed more brain cells than alcohol, cocaine, and meth combined.” — Michel Templet Copy Share Image
“Unbeknown to us, some of the people who we hope are missing us wherever they are do miss us; some miss someone… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
The key to comedy is commitment - if you're afraid, you shouldn't be a comedian. — Nick Swardson Copy Share Image
“I don't know. I don't understand how boys think. If I knew that I'd be a millionare.” — Magan Vernon Copy Share Image
A luxury meal was prairie sandwiches - two slices of bread with wide-open spaces between them. — Chic Murray Copy Share Image
“Lady Ponsonby was right. The forbidden fruit isn't shaped like an apple. It's shaped like a banana.” — Michelle Marcos Copy Share Image
