“I swear, sometimes talking to you is like trying to converse with a tree. A very big, very solid, very male tree.” — Julie Ann Walker Copy Share Image
Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals. — Agnes Repplier Copy Share Image
Any kind of change in your life creates more material for me, because I say in my act 'It ain't comedy, it's… — John Pinette Copy Share Image
“A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend will be sitting next to you Saying, 'Damn. We fucked… — Cheyenne McCray Copy Share Image
I'd love to do all types of film, not just comedy, although I love comedy. — Malin Akerman Copy Share Image
If I wanted to be bored by 6,000 pages of unreadable dreck, I'd read War and Peace four times. — Lewis Black Copy Share Image
It is characteristic of all deep human problems that they arenot to be approached without some humor and some bewilderment. — Freeman Dyson Copy Share Image
“We didn’t have a date. A date ends in a kiss, not blood and broken cartilage.” — Cath Crowley Copy Share Image
I certainly think, obviously, rhythm is a huge part of being an actor. It just is unconscious, to a degree, but particularly… — Simon Helberg Copy Share Image
I do think, with people in comedy, you can have your time, as it were, and then you don't realise that it… — Julia Davis Copy Share Image
“You would never do anything like that, would you?" my wife asked him. "You would never hurt animals." Our son shook his… — Michael Chabon Copy Share Image
I love to play strippers and to imitate them. I love using that idea for comedy, but the idea of actually going… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“A handy tip: When angels say “be not afraid,” you should be afraid. Also, as I said earlier, we have to memorize… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
Yeah, I love living in New York, man, and people who live in New York, we wear that fact like a badge… — Denis Leary Copy Share Image
“Trin Tragula—for that was his name—was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.”… — Douglas Adams Copy Share Image
“Bruce Wayne's parents get killed and he goes to Tibet or whatever, and Superman is an alien, and Spiderman had that radioactive… — Rachel Hawkins Copy Share Image
“I like pancakes! And I have a gun. I shoot bad guys with it. Sometimes, bad guys go to sleep and don't… — Stephen Jenner Copy Share Image
Jerry Bruckheimer creates comedy, he just doesn't realize because he's a turd. — Trey Parker Copy Share Image
She knew what all smart women knew: Laughter made you live better and longer. — Gail Parent Copy Share Image
“People who call themselves divas...you are not a diva. I'm pretty sure you're a cunt.” — Sarah Silverman Copy Share Image
“Oh, come now, Manon,” Ilyse laughed, “It’s my job to liven things up a bit, too. I can’t let you and your… — Melika Dannese Lux Copy Share Image
“We don’t like it when women get uppity.” “Well,” she said, “that is a bit of a problem, as I am feeling… — Sarah MacLean Copy Share Image
“Why hasn't anyone killed him yet?” “Dumb luck,” Wit said. “In that I’m lucky you’re all so dumb.” — Brandon Sanderson Copy Share Image
I like to do comedy, but I'll be perfectly honest, I prefer to do drama and more character-driven-based stuff, generally. — Matt Dillon Copy Share Image
Life sucks, then you find a bunch of funny comments of how life sucks on the internet, then you laugh and realize… — Daniel Smith Copy Share Image
People like me doing comedy, especially after 'Khatron Ke Khiladi,' where they got a glimpse. — Sana Khan Copy Share Image
Marriage is an institution in which a Man loses his Bachelors degree, and the Woman gets her Masters. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You know, I'm not very good at magic - I can only do half of a trick. Yes - I'm a member… — Tim Vine Copy Share Image
“...It’s pretty simple, really: having fun can only led to having more fun-- it cannot led to injury, pain, or dismemberment.” — Tom Upton Copy Share Image
“No, I don't think I will kiss you, although you need kissing, badly. That's what's wrong with you.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
How about a good comedy? 'Raising Arizona.' Remains the funniest movie I've ever seen in my life. — Lee Unkrich Copy Share Image
“Really? well, thank you. I was under the impression you wouldn't spit on me if I was on fire” — Abbi Glines Copy Share Image
“He holds his hands up to keep the Reapers from advancing. I forgot Zack's flair for the melodramatic. ~Exposing ELE” — Courtney Nuckels Copy Share Image
How can I tell if someone is pretty on the inside without looking in all of her orifices? — Rock Cowles Copy Share Image
“No wonder I worried about talking dirty; talking in general seemed to escape me.” — Jordan Castillo Price Copy Share Image
“P.S. I also note that you included the Stalker's Anthem "Every Breath You Take" I do enjoy our sense of humor, but… — E.L. James Copy Share Image
“Anxiety's like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you very far.” — Jodi Picoult Copy Share Image
The life of every individual is really always a tragedy, but gone through in detail, it has the character of a comedy. — Arthur Schopenhauer Copy Share Image
I chose Eat: LA as a broadcast partner because of its good taste, sense of humor, and spirit of adventure. — John Rabe Copy Share Image
