On the mound is Randy Jones, the left-hander with the Karl Marx hairdo. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
“Sex with the gorilla went on a bit, but once he'd stumbled over my clitoris we both had good times.” — Sue Townsend Copy Share Image
Percy wouldn't notice a joke if it danced naked in front of him wearing one of Dobby's hats. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
As long as you can savor the humorous aspect of misery and misfortune, you can overcome anything. — John Candy Copy Share Image
“Q: Best part about being a musical theatre book writer? A: Explaining what that is.” — Christy Hall Copy Share Image
I let the phone ring instead of rejecting the call because I dont want the person to know I'm ignoring them. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I envisioned him tied in a chair, an iron arrow pointed at his brow. Ah, the power of positive thinking.” — Red Tash Copy Share Image
“See, you think I give a shit. Wrong. In fact, while you talk, I'm thinking; How can I give less of shit?… — Justin Halpern Copy Share Image
I always say, 'Thank goodness 'Wimpy Kid' was a comedy because my singing in that was more humorous than professional.' — Devon Bostick Copy Share Image
What I'm trying to do through comedy is to be a solution. I'm trying to do something because the world is so… — Omid Djalili Copy Share Image
When I was younger, I used humour as a tool to avoid getting too serious with people - if there was deep… — Matthew Perry Copy Share Image
“Artículo 37. Un Colega no está obligado a abrirle caballerosamente la puerta a nadie [...], ellas mismas pueden abrir las puertas. Seamos… — Barney Stinson Copy Share Image
“Please don’t hug me. Please don’t hug me. But she did. And now Bram had two sets of black eyes glaring at… — G.A. Aiken Copy Share Image
“Miss Taverner took the whip and reins in her hands, and mounted into the driving-seat, scorning assistance. "Take your orders from Miss… — Georgette Heyer Copy Share Image
“I pushed Ezra back for a second. He had taken the make out session up a notch upon Logan’s arrival. I knew… — Melissa Starr Copy Share Image
“You're doing it again and it really annoys me. In fact, I will have to kill you now because I have a… — Louise Rennison Copy Share Image
I think it's true of every great comedy that it's rooted in some dramatic, incredibly personal truth. And it's true of all… — Lucas Hedges Copy Share Image
“It’s adult swim time and I’m diving in here at the shallow end.” — Suzanne Finnamore Copy Share Image
“He tapped into the Zen of ignorance, the enlightenment of absurdity.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“I didn’t get my nap today. Wouldn’t do for someone to piss me off.” — Stephanie McAfee Copy Share Image
![“Artículo 37. Un Colega no está obligado a abrirle caballerosamente la puerta a nadie [...], ellas mismas pueden abrir las puertas. Seamos sinceros, una puerta no pesa tanto.” quote by Barney Stinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3dd/barney-stinson-27111_art_art-culo-37-un-colega-no-est-obligado-a_1717663.jpg)
![“-Shut the FUCK UP, said Jesus. [ The New Statesman , 3 July 1998]” quote by T.A. Keizer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/592/t-a-keizer-189682_humor_shut-the-fuck-up-said-jesus-the-new-stat_1095798.jpg)
