Humor Quotes · Page 199

“If you want to feel like ginger ale Claire, drink a ginger ale.”

— Ann Hood

“I'm about as intimidating as a butterfly.”

— Dan Howell

Something that is very difficult to translate is the humor.

— Luis Negron

You ever read a book that changed your life? Me neither.

— Jim Gaffigan

“First rule of Angel Club, you do not talk about Angel Club.”

— Cynthia Hand

Welcome back, my cheeky wee monkeys.

— Craig Ferguson

Wickedly funny to read and morally bracing as only good satire can be.

— William Styron

To be perfectly honest, drama is a lot simpler than comedy.

— Nikki Cox

“Quotations "Oh man, I hate that poofing shit. You scared me so bad, Ash, you made me eat this crappy cheese." (Nick…

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

I've always idolized Amy Poehler, because I think she's the best of the best as far as female comedy.

— Kristen Bell

Everybody kind of looks to comedians and comedy for relief and a fresh breath about what is going on in the world.

— Sean Hayes

'Gujarat 11' has a good script; it is a full package of entertainment, comedy, emotions and has a message for the audience.

— Daisy Shah

“Only an idiot would try to break into a super-secret super-protected mansion while wearing maroon knee high boots.”

— Stefani Chaney

Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The Doctor says I'm okay, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.

— Anonymous

In my mind, if you write a comedy where human beings experience pain, you're just being realistic.

— James L. Brooks

“At one point I thought I broke his face, but he turned out to just be laughing really hard.”

— Vali Chandrasekaran

“Good luck with that," I said. Because seriously. The fuck? Strawberry social? Did I somehow move onto the set of the remake…

— Susan Juby

“...'You haven't got a chance kid,' he had told him glumly. 'They hate Jews.' 'But I'm not Jewish,' answered Clevinger. 'It will…

— Joseph Heller

“A few years back, an American Jewish feminist academic sent me a request for an interview... The professor presented herself as a…

— Gilad Atzmon

When you wake up one day and say, "You know what? I don't think I ever need to sleep or have sex…

— Ray Romano

“It’s a training camp,” Leo realized. He looked at Aphros in awe. “You train heroes, the same way Chiron does?” Aphros nodded,…

— Rick Riordan

With prodigious bravery and eviscerating humor, Roxane Gay takes on culture and politics in Bad Feminist-and gets it right, time and time…

— Ayelet Waldman

“He knows about sacrificing himself for the good of the whole.That's what soldiers do.It's not the torture he can't forgive me for.…

— Patricia Briggs

On the most Scottish thing he'd ever seen: I was going through a town called Bathgate at around 11 o'clock at night.…

— Frankie Boyle

I don't have any powers other than the power of sex. And humor.

— Morena Baccarin

I'm such a comedy nerd and a Groundlings nerd, 'SNL' nerd.

— Molly Gordon

He is like a female llama surprised in her bath.

— Winston Churchill

I take comedy very seriously, and I feel very competitive.

— Jeff Kinney

Sarah Silverman has always been a huge influence on my comedy.

— Jinkx Monsoon

There are very few good judges of humor, and they don't agree.

— Josh Billings

“If you don't have a sense of humor, then you have nothing at all.”

— Robert M. Roberts

People are funny in the way that they choose to express themselves.

— Frank Vincent

There are two kinds of cruises - pleasure and with children.

— George Burns

It's best if you can do things with a sense of humor and finesse.

— Eartha Kitt

Fall in love? I can't even fall asleep!

— Anonymous

“I'm not scared of death, I just don't want to seek it out.”

— Tommy Higgins

My comedy is not mine. It's a gift. I'm not that smart.

— Tim Allen

If all else fails immortality can always be assured by adequate error.

— John Kenneth Galbraith

“Desperately Lonely Swing Set Needs Loving Home,'" he said.”

— John Green

“The revolution won’t be televised…" but there is an App for that.”

— Gary Wayne Clark