“Riding a Dragon is amazing, exhilarating, and murder on the thighs.” — Bryan Fields Copy Share Image
I always give 100% at Work: 10% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 22% Thursday, 5% Friday! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear Brain, Please start being able to tell the difference between hungry and bored. Sincerely, I am getting fat. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“One can hardly do anything productive when one knows there is cake in the fridge.” — Joyce Rachelle Copy Share Image
You look up at drama, down at comedy. A singer, looking up is okay. A comic, it's death. — Buddy Hackett Copy Share Image
“Why do I have to do the sewin'? 'Cause I'm a girl? Is that it? It ain't fair, I tell ya!” — Sean Cullen Copy Share Image
I can't live without a sense of humor. I need to be laughing and entertained at all times. — Carlos Ponce Copy Share Image
“God's only mistakes are dogs and not giving cats opposable thumbs. Otherwise, it's a perfect world.” — Quasi Copy Share Image
Nobody thanks a witty man for politeness when he puts himself on a par with a society in which it would not… — Friedrich Nietzsche Copy Share Image
“Honestly, the only question most Americans ask about a new building at this point is basically: Is it a soul-sucking eyesore of… — Sarah Vowell Copy Share Image
“Come, come," I said. "You may be a lord someday, but you aren't one yet. No need for the courtly manners, and… — Julie Berry Copy Share Image
That said, it was pretty awkward and a weird thing to shoot. Some women had a sense of humour about it and… — Nicole Holofcener Copy Share Image
You can’t. He has it shielded. Besides, he’s a god and can be a nasty one if you upset him. You try… — Sherrilyn Kenyon Copy Share Image
There's something very funny about giving a menial task to a genius and watching him find so much complexity and overanalyse it… — Simon Helberg Copy Share Image
“White people love rock climbing almost more than they love camping. This is because the activity affords them the opportunity to be… — Christian Lander Copy Share Image
“Are you okay?" "Leave me alone, Charlie." "No, really. What's wrong?" "You wouldn't understand." "I could try." "That's a laugh. That's really… — Stephen Chbosky Copy Share Image
With John Wayne Gacy - the serial killer who dressed up as a clown - there's just something about clowns I don't… — Allison Janney Copy Share Image
The next best thing to being witty is to quote another's wit. — Christian Nevell Bovee Copy Share Image
“I wear my cool on the inside; that's why my hands are always so cold.” — Dia Reeves Copy Share Image
