Get Quotes by Mike Birbiglia

You know the quickest way to get comedians to hate you? Do Letterman at age 24.

— Mike Birbiglia

I never looked at my parents' marriage or really anyone who had been married more than 30 years and thought, 'I gotta…

— Mike Birbiglia

The moment I walk into a room, I have kind of like the Terminator's tracking system for where the food is, and…

— Mike Birbiglia

When I started out, I really struggled as a comic because no one knew who I was, and sometimes I was telling…

— Mike Birbiglia

It's a difficult line to tread, where sometimes you go to the movies or you watch someone do publicity for movies or…

— Mike Birbiglia

Every sleep doctor I've talked to said it was an urban legend that you shouldn't wake up a sleepwalker. All that will…

— Mike Birbiglia

I was completely unqualified to get into Harvard. But then I went to my interview for Harvard, and the woman asked, 'Why…

— Mike Birbiglia

I got out of school in 2000, and I always wanted to be on 'This American Life,' since I first started telling…

— Mike Birbiglia

I think that my regrets mostly have to do with my relationship with my ex-girlfriend. Every once in a while, you get…

— Mike Birbiglia

You get to the end of something, you're laughing, you're like, 'That's funny, and that's funny,' and then you get to the…

— Mike Birbiglia

When I wrote the screenplay for 'Sleepwalk with Me,' I was imagining that another person would direct it. So I was using…

— Mike Birbiglia

Directing a movie is a little bit like being back in student government and putting on the homecoming dance. You're like, 'You…

— Mike Birbiglia