Funny Quotes · Page 64

“Everything is funny when its happening to some esle”

— YOUNG-RICHARD OSAGIE

A truly international field, no Britons involved.

— David Coleman

When someone breaks your leg,dont break his back.

— Anonymous

I happen to be a chain breather.

— Robert Sylvester

Nothing burps better than bacon.

— Ed O'Neill

The only rule is that there are no rules.

— Del Close

Everything I think of now is too rude to actually say.

— Craig Ferguson

A library is a feast to which we are all invited.

— Katherine Paterson

This job will drive me to drink, and for that reason, I will be eternally grateful.

— W. C. Fields

Let knowledge be guessed by the sign of equality to all beings.

— Ramana Maharshi

Don't tell me how talented you are. Tell me how hard you work.

— Arthur Rubinstein

Spiders are nature's perverts... Why else are they found in the bathrooms?

— Nikhil Saluja

We are not built for ourselves, but for God. Not for service for God, but for God.

— Oswald Chambers

I came home and found that my son was taking drugs - my very best ones too!

— Bob Monkhouse

Complacency is almost always the product of success or perceived success

— John P. Kotter

To all the teachers that told me I'd never amount to nothing.

— The Notorious B.I.G

The only good thing about seeing my coworkers on Monday is they're the only people I don't have to apologize to for…

— Anonymous

What's not to love about us! People got to know Misty and me in Athens. We've continued to be successful and continued…

— Kerri Walsh

School tomorrow same shit fake bitches annoying teachers ratchet hoes fake thugs unnecessary drama annoying ass people

— Arjun Loveable

Ever wonder about the true purpose of mosquitoes? I'm thinking it must be God's source of amusement... watching us slap ourselves!

— Green Monk

Everyday life is pretty funny and pretty ridiculous and occasionally really great, though not all the time, and that's all part of…

— Owen King

“What have you done to your hair?” Mom’s broken voice said, pinning me back to this tiny hospital room. “Holy shit!” Icka…

— Phoebe Kitanidis

“Have I come at a bad time?" she managed to say without guffawing. I believe I said something on the order of…

— Jeffrey Cohen

A girl who is really pretty - whether she wraps herself in an abayah, a nun's habit, or the front hall rug…

— P. J. O'Rourke

I don't understand why or how we can bully each other.

— Aurora Aksnes

It's not showing off if you back it up.

— Dolph Ziggler

Think inside the work - outside the work

— Brian Eno

Returning hate for hate multiplies hate...

— Martin Luther King, Jr

Happiness is free, there are no conditions.

— Robert Holden

A sewer is a cynic. It tells All.

— Victor Hugo

Never take relationship advice from single friends...

— Anonymous

LOVE, An emotion, even if un-returned, has its rainbow;

— Nikhil Saluja

An outside enemy exists only if there is anger inside.

— Gautama Buddha

Do the best you can, and then to hell with it!

— Eunice Kennedy Shriver

A small act is worth a million thoughts.

— Ai Weiwei

You cannot stay the way you are and go with God.

— Henry Blackaby

No one is in your life by mistake.

— James Van Praagh

Tweet the tweet you want to retweet.

— Green Monk

If the enemy is in range, so are you.

— Infantry Journal

You the one in all, say who I am. Say I am you.

— Rumi