The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney. — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain: Very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I take acting very seriously. I put everything I have and know into it. — Colin Farrell Copy Share Image
Conference: One man's confusion multiplied by the number of people there. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I urge you to travel - as far and as widely as possible. Sleep on floors if you have to. — Anthony Bourdain Copy Share Image
Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The Doctor says I'm okay, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I believe in choosing your words very carefully. It's funny: I'll get comments like, 'Oh I love you. You don't care; you… — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
I can't help thinking the failed New York bomber would've done far more damage if he'd simply driven throught Times Square in… — Frankie Boyle Copy Share Image
Be WARNED... my TELL ALL Button is located right beside my GO AHEAD & PISS ME OFF BUTTON So if U &… — Iris Thomas Copy Share Image
It's good they're holding the Olympics in the East End of London. Means the athletes will have to use extra skill to… — Frankie Boyle Copy Share Image
Dang it don't see how other girls wear their pants so freaking tight, that when they fart their shoes don't fly off. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The Japanese tend to communicate via nuance and euphemism, often leaving important things unsaid; whereas Americans tend to think they're being subtle… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“What would Golan Do? That way I can ask myself before I do anything. Before I take a dump. How would Dr.… — Ransom Riggs Copy Share Image
