I write by ear. I tried writing with the typewriter, but I found it too unwieldy — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Inflation hasn't ruined everything. A dime can still be used as a screwdriver. — H. Jackson Brown, Jr Copy Share Image
You know nothing for sure...except the fact that you know nothing for sure. — John F. Kennedy Copy Share Image
It is possible to have good manners and be funny at the same time. Ronnie Barker and I proved that. — Ronnie Corbett Copy Share Image
TM in the a.m. and the p.m…20 minutes in the bank, all day in the market place. — Maharishi Mahesh Yogi Copy Share Image
“Don’t answer the door without a shirt! Now, go get dressed before you catch a cold,” I scolded. “Why? He was kinda… — J.M. Colail Copy Share Image
“Just rolled out of bed." "I can see that." His eyes swept over me. "You should roll around in your bed more… — Veronica Blade Copy Share Image
“I put a knife in your hand and your first instinct was to stab me." "You tried to stab me first," I… — Alwyn Hamilton Copy Share Image
So many people: Lucille Ball is the earliest incarnation of a woman I thought was funny, Joan Rivers, Roseanne, Carol Burnett, Gilda… — Chelsea Peretti Copy Share Image
Every time that we'd do something funny Ferrell would accidentally like hit the camera or lose the film. Hair in the gate,… — Amy Poehler Copy Share Image
When youre walking, then start texting and walking slower, and slower, and slower, until youre just standing there texting — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Not married. Mostly because no one has ever asked me,” Leah said lightly. Izzy pulled a disbelieving face. “Are the men in… — Sarah Mayberry Copy Share Image
He appeared to enjoy beyond everything the sound of his own voice. I couldn't wonder at that, for it was mellow and… — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image
