I'm so ugly - My father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet — Rodney Dangerfield Copy Share Image
My boyfriend not allowed to wear anything Nike, the only thing he better be 'Just Doing' is me. — Caitlin Copy Share Image
What we are assigned to bear is in a sense a measure of our stature. — Peter De Vries Copy Share Image
Just go as a whore for Halloween. You obviously have all the clothes for it. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Just because we have a thought, doesn't mean it is a thought worth having. — Bill Crawford Copy Share Image
The idea of me being an icon or something is a very funny thing, just because of my own weird insecurities. But,… — JPEGMAFIA Copy Share Image
Memory, like so much else, is unreliable. Not only for what it hides and what it alters, but also for what it… — Anna Funder Copy Share Image
“Thank you.” A bright blush stained her cheeks. “For last night. For chasing the monsters away…” “Anytime. It’s kind of my job… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Whoever you hate will end up in your family. You don't like gays? You're gonna have a gay son. You don't like… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Spain travel tip: If bathroom genders are indicated by flamingos, the boy flamingo is the one with a hat. I learned this… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The British are apt to make merits of their stupidities, and to represent their various incapacities as points of good breeding. — George Bernard Shaw Copy Share Image
No matter how popular you are as a stand-up - you can go out and fill a 10,000-seat arena and be smart… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
A good friend would bail you out of jail, but your best friend would be the one sitting next to you saying,… — Gorgeous_girl Copy Share Image
