If you don't like me, it's not my fault.. it just means you have no taste! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
To whoever stole my Microsoft Office: You're gonna pay. You have my Word! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Was trying to count sheep to help me sleep but I don't think I'll be able to sleep anymore after being chased… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Beware of ego: Ego is a double edged sword the outer edge cuts your popularity; while the inner edge pierces your purity. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
If a guy only wants you for your legs , thighs , or breasts , don't date him , give him directions to KFC . — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Hate when I get drunk at a bar and hot chicks waste the opportunity to take sexual advantage of me. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you went to kiss your GALFRND, and She burped right in your mouth… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I wish I could get excited about anything as much as girls get excited about cupcakes. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
A male inmate promised a female prison guard, If you help me escape, I'll marry you. This is an example of using… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Be Careful With What You Say To A G!rl. One Rude Comment That You Think Is No Big Deal Can Ruin Her… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I saw a sign today that almost made me piss myself. It said Bathrooms closed. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
That mysterious toothbrush in the bathroom that nobody in your family uses.. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I hate when someone gets lost in my eyes & they forget what they're telling me. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Real men know how to communicate. They know when to talk & when to listen. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
The only possible way I would find you attractive is if you swallowed a magnet. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Nah, we're cool! Just make sure you remind me how awesome I am 3 times a day. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Some, given the scepter of responsibility, confuse it with the club of authority. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you see someone coming your way after you've just farted. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Women fake headaches to get out of having sex with their man, and men fake not being married to have sex with a woman. — Green Monk Copy Share
I've been told by so many women that I'm a great listener. A majority of them, have big boobs. — Green Monk Copy Share
Scientists have found that women share the same dna as prawns.. Their heads are full of shit but their pink bits taste amazing! — Green Monk Copy Share
When someone is mad and asks you Do I look stupid? Don't answer them just stare curiously at them — Green Monk Copy Share
You may love a girl very deeply... But u CANNOT express it more deeper than... 5, 6 or 7 inches... — Green Monk Copy Share
Note To Females: You cant blame the entire male genre just because you were attracted to some assholes. — Green Monk Copy Share
That awkward moment when you can't understand what someone has said even though they have repeated it four times — Green Monk Copy Share
Life should come with a remote. There are so many moments I'd give up my life for to pause, fast-forward, and rewind. — Green Monk Copy Share
I wish Twitter would notify me when someone UN-followed me, that way I could go star it. — Green Monk Copy Share
I like those Birthday reminders on Facebook because occasionally they remind me of the friends I need to Delete. — Green Monk Copy Share
