Choose a guy who takes you to his house to meet his parents, not his bedroom. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
With so many girls using filter, I'm assuming true beauty is hard to find nowadays — Emanuel Sebastiao Copy Share Image
Roses are red, Facebook is blue. Mutual friends are great, but who the f*ck are you? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Words of Wisdom: it's easier to change a condom than it is to change a diaper. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My hair looks good: 3% at school. 7% at home. 90% before I'm about to shower. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Relationships nowadays = First week: I love you baby.. Second week: Together forever.. Third week: Single.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Unwritten rule of life: If you're in a hurry someone slow will always manage to end up in front of you. — Brian Zilinek Copy Share Image
George Zimmerman murdered a teen: Bail set at $150,000. Lindsay Lohan failed a drug test: Bail set at $300,000 This is our justice system. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Staring at something you just dropped and wondering if you should pick it up or leave it and go on with your… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Mostly all famous inventions start off as an accidents. For instance, my invention of running over cats. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Never talk down about your relationship on Twitter or Facebook. Don't let people know when your home isn't happy, that's when outsiders… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Before all I can do is to hide from you ,cause I don't know how to express my feeling for you. But… — Strawberry Copy Share Image
There's just something wonderful about a cold, clear winter morning that makes you want to slow down and take time to stop… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
It's my mouth I say what I want too, and it's my wall I can write anything I feel like to write — Junior Dè Rèál Testament Copy Share Image
If I said It would take too long to explain. I really meant I have no idea how it works. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When girls want love they offer sex, when guys want sex they offer love. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Who cares if people dont like me,after all,im not a facebook status to be liked. — Redeyeen Copy Share Image
While youre on the other line Ill keep thinking about, Ways that I can make you mine. — Emanuel Sebastiao Copy Share Image
I like a song, I download it, I listen to it a million times, and then I can't stand it. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Women give sex in exchange for love while men give love in exchange for sex — Bigboyalweezy Copy Share Image
My girl went away for the weekend, and I didn't masturbate once. I masturbated 21 times. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Nothing is sadder than a guy who complains on Facebook about how shitty his sex life is. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My wife always bring these injured animals to home. I think she should just stop driving. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Taking your own candy to the movies. $6.00 for a bag of skittles my ass. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My ex updated his Facebook status and said he was standing on a cliff, so I poked him. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When I kill a bug in my house, I leave the dead body around for a bit to warn the others.!!! — Tufail Mehraj Copy Share Image
Everytime someone tweet 'Love is in the air' I usually go & shave my balls. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
