Most people work all week to get to the weekend. A few work all weekend for years to get to freedom. — Robert Kiyosaki Copy Share Image
Just as irrigation is the lifeblood of the Southwest, lifeblood is the soup of cannibals. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Philosophy is the sum total of all that you know and what you decide is valuable. — Jim Rohn Copy Share Image
Thinking is like loving and dying. Each of us must do it for himself. — Josiah Royce Copy Share Image
Life is a dream.. Death is also a dream..for that matter, waking is a dream and sleeping is a dream. Every situation… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you make ships in a bottle, I bet the thing that really makes your heart sink is when you look in,… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Higher beings from outer space may not want to tell us the secrets of life, because we're not ready. But maybe they'll… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
If you're ever shipwrecked on a tropical island and you don't know how to speak the natives' language, just say "Poppy-oomy." I… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Here's a good joke to do during an earthquake: straddle a big crack in the ground, and if it opened wider, go… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Focusing on one's own purpose is a matter of considering what you want to do, why you want to do it, and… — John Baldoni Copy Share Image
Exactly!" said Deep Thought. "So once you do know what the question actually is, you'll know what the answer means. — Douglas Adams Copy Share Image
If I come back as an animal in my next lifetime, I hope it's some type of parasite, because this is the… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Why has time disappeared in our culture? How is it that after decades of inventions and new technologies devoted to saving time… — Jacob Needleman Copy Share Image
A businessman cannot force you to buy his product; if he makes a mistake, he suffers the consequences; if he fails, he… — Ayn Rand Copy Share Image
I think a good product would be Baby Duck Hat. It's a fake baby duck, which you strap on top of your… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I bet if you were a mummy wrapper in ancient Egypt, on thing you would constantly find yourself telling people would be,… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Folks still remember the day ole Bob Riley came bouncing down that dirt road in his pickup. Pretty soon, it was bouncing… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Do you know that the words meditation and medicine come from the same root? Meditation is a kind of medicine; its use… — Rajneesh Copy Share Image
It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. And I guess that's what I like about it.… — Jack Handy Copy Share Image
“O Deep Thought computer," he said, "the task we have designed you to perform is this. We want you to tell us…"… — Douglas Adams Copy Share Image
Could you stop my heart? It's always beating. Sinking like a weight. I don't think I am okay. No not today .… — Kaile Stewart Copy Share Image
“I'm full of shit. I’m never myself. I've got a Southern accent around the oldsters; I’m a nerd for graphs and deep… — John green Copy Share Image
“I have a deep thought for you. Science fiction is just beginning to catch up with the Old Testament. See artificial nitrates… — Don DeLillo Copy Share Image
The people in the village were real poor, so none of the children had any toys. But this one little boy had… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be "Clark Kent, Dentist," because you could save money… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
“I noticed Xander had subtly adjusted his posture. He slouched slightly to the side, let his head hang, and then looked up… — Adrianne Ambrose Copy Share Image
In my first publication I might have claimed that I had come to the conclusion, as a result of serious study of… — Alexander Fleming Copy Share Image
