Laugh, clown, laugh. This is what I tell myself whenever I dress up like Bozo. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Nothing worthwhile is ever achieved without deep thought and hard work, — J. R. D. Tata Copy Share Image
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I think in one of my previous lives I was a mighty king, because I like people to do what I say. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
The question is not, "Why is there only one way to God?" but "Why is there even one way?" — R. C. Sproul Copy Share Image
Very deep. You should send that in to the Reader's Digest. They've got a page for people like you. — Douglas Adams Copy Share Image
How could passion run so deep Had I never thought That the crime of being born Blackens all our lot? — William Butler Yeats Copy Share Image
I guess we were all guilty, in a way. We all shot him, we all skinned him, and we all got a… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
You know what's probably a good thing to hang on your porch in the summertime, to keep mosquitoes away from you and… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Can't the Marx Brothers be arrested and maybe even tortured for all the confusion and problems they've caused? — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
If doctors ever tell you that you've "flipped out," don't believe them, and just keep on doing what you were doing, because… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Realization is not knowledge about the universe, but the living experience of the nature of the universe. Until we have such living… — Namkhai Norbu Copy Share Image
Man is born only as a potential. He can become a thorn for himself and for others, he can also become a… — Rajneesh Copy Share Image
Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights, even if you don't know what your rights are,… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When I read some of the things other movie people say about their work, I think I'm in the wrong business. I… — Fred MacMurray Copy Share Image
I think there should be something in science called the "reindeer effect." I don't know what it would be, but I think… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I had learned to respect the intelligence, integrity, creativity and capacity for deep thought and hard work latent somewhere in every child;… — Sybil Marshall Copy Share Image
I remember how the other kids used to say that old Mister Swenson was the meanest man in town. But I said… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Mysterious power, whence hope ethereal springs! Sweet heavenly relic of eternal things! Inspiring oft deep thoughts of things divine: The past, the… — Parley P. Pratt Copy Share Image
I not only think but also look and study things carefully. When I travel around, I look at things carefully, make comparisons… — Mahathir Mohamad Copy Share Image
“The coops were finished. They were not masterpieces, and I have seen chickens pause before them in deep thought, as who should… — P.G. Wodehouse Copy Share Image
If I ever opened a trampoline store, I don't think I'd call it Trampo-Land, because you might think it was a store… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
As we were driving, we saw a sign that said, "Watch for Rocks." Martha said it should read "Watch for Pretty Rocks."… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
“To live, fiction must be read, and to be read it must be enjoyed. Why do so many people talk about the… — Trevor Cole Copy Share Image
If I lived in the Wild West days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
“And yet the debate was highly informative—if you turned the sound off. The event was broadcast with a split screen so that… — P.J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Sometimes you need to run away just to see who will follow you.Its hard to answer the question whats wrong when nothings… — Kaile Stewart Copy Share Image
Too bad when I was a kid there wasn't a guy in our class that everybody called the "Cricket Boy", because I… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
“I account him no common, shallow being, inasmuch as it is an undisputed fact that he is never found on soundings, or… — Herman Melville Copy Share Image
“I'm not what anyone thinks I am. I never was. I didn't have the mouth to put it into words, to say… — Akwaeke Emezi Copy Share Image
If aliens from outer space ever come and we show them our civilization and they make fun of it, we should say… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
