Comedian Quotes · Page 5

I would loved to be called an actor, and not comedian.

— Kiku Sharda

No comedian grows up thinking, 'I hope one day to have a show on CNN.'

— W. Kamau Bell

I left home to become a singer and didn't realise when I turned comedian.

— Kapil Sharma

I thought comedians had to have black on their faces or red beards.

— Dorothy Gish

All of my comedian friends are some of the best joke writers in the world.

— Ron White

Good comedians are great philosophers.

— Reggie Watts

To be a comedian, you gotta jokesmith, there's no way around it.

— John Leguizamo

People tend to feel that if you're a comedian, you can't act.

— David Jason

If people leave the house wanting to see a comedian, they want to see someone speak out for themselves and share true…

— James Acaster

I like the ironic pomposity of a stand-up comedian. Like all those comedians thinking they can bring down Coca-Cola. They forget to…

— Ricky Gervais

I'm a Sit Down Stand Up Comedian, whatever the hell that is. Maybe a writer with a short attention span and one…

— Rock Cowles

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight?

— George Carlin

I am not an educator and I'm not a journalist. I am a comedian. But I do truly believe that the point…

— Adam Conover

I’ve come to view Jesus much the way I view Elvis. I love the guy but the fan clubs really freak me…

— John Fugelsang

Russell Brand has announced that he plans to write a series of children's books. First up: 'Horton Hears a Heroin Dealer.'

— Joan Rivers

Being a comedian, it's hard. People hear 'YouTuber,' and they automatically think, 'a social warrior,' and you have to stand up for…

— Shane Dawson

Basically, I thought I had nothing to lose so I'd try my luck as a stand-up comedian. So even if it all…

— Alan Carr

“A lot of people say there's a fine line between genius and insanity. I don't think there's a fine line, I actually…

— Bill Bailey

As a comedian, I can walk out in front of 5000 people and not worry about a thing. Not a thing, believe…

— Bill Cosby

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one thing that I feel like I could…

— Larry David

Whatever you want to do in the industry, do it on the smallest level at first. If you want to be a…

— Ike Barinholtz

As we got older, we grew comfortable in roles that met our parents' expectations. Nora was the smart one. Delia, the comedian.…

— Hallie Ephron

The only time I get sick of making people laugh is when I'm in a non-writing-joke mode, and I just can't seem…

— Bill Burr

When a soldier of the night's watch dies they say, "And now his watch is over." That's what they say when a…

— Brad Williams

If a comedian tells a joke that you find funny, you laugh. If he tells a joke you do not find funny,…

— Gilbert Gottfried

I've never been able to tell jokes. In the beginning of my career I did impressions and jokes like any other comedian,…

— Don Rickles

It was a very interesting experience. You know, I don't think words could do it justice. Roseanne [Barr] is a comedian, a…

— Jill Stein

Roxanne came along in '86, when I was doing a lot of stand-up. I auditioned for the movie, and of course I…

— Kevin Nealon

Many businessmen fail to understand Python principles--the ultimate absurdity was an offer from America to buy the 'format' of the Python shows,…

— Robert Hewison

It's a great time to be a comedian because you've got so much more control. You can say what you want to.…

— Bill Burr

It’s sad. Marxism didn’t work. Communism didn’t work. Capitalism doesn’t work. Nothing works. Even democracy doesn’t work. Democracy-the greatest form of government…

— Colin Quinn

We're shaking up a format, which I think is always a good thing. The thing about [2011 Oscar hosts] James [Franco] and…

— Bruce Vilanch

I would never have considered becoming a comedian when I was a student.

— Tim Key

Your dream has to be bigger than your fear.

— Steve Harvey

Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be.

— Fanny Brice

Stand-up is therapy. I'm sure every comedian has something wrong with them.

— Lee Evans

I haven't met a comedian who is judgemental of other comedians.

— John Bishop

I love standup comedians. I really do.

— Jim Gaffigan

I like the comedians that go into detail and tell longer stories.

— Michael Showalter

I always wanted to be a comedian, but I wasn't sure how you do that.

— Ron Shock