This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday... I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me - Homeland Security. — Art Buchwald Copy Share Image
Every time you think television has hit its lowest ebb, a new program comes along to make you wonder where you thought the ebb… — Art Buchwald Copy Share Image
I found out I'd spent my whole life believing things that weren't necessarily accurate. My sisters' memories of certain events are entirely different from… — Art Buchwald Copy Share Image
I can now say without hesitation the Marine Corps was the best foster home I ever had. — Art Buchwald Copy Share Image
Writers are funny about reviews: when they get a good one they ignore it-- but when they get a bad review they never forget it. Every writer I know is the same way: you get a hundred good reviews, and one bad, andyou remember only the bad. For years, you go on and fantasize about the reviewer who didn't like… — Art Buchwald Copy Share
No one ever mentioned it, but thousands of men welcomed World War II as a way to escape their humdrum lives rather than a… — Art Buchwald Copy Share Image
Don't commit suicide, because you might change your mind two weeks later. — Art Buchwald Copy Share Image
When it came to writing about wine, I did what almost everybody does - faked it — Art Buchwald Copy Share Image
An economist is a man who knows a hundred ways of making love but doesn't know any women. — Art Buchwald Copy Share Image
