“My brother’s a big dog guy. He’s 7’2” and half man, half man’s best friend.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“One of your siblings has got to be the dumbest. And if you’re an only child—you’re the dumb one.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“She had a picture of a llama, so under it I wrote, “I didn’t know you knew my brother.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I'm the oldest of twelve brothers. However, the other eleven are yet to be born.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A sister should set her brother up with one of her friends, unless her only friend is her sister.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Were you aware that my sister looks like my brother? They both look nonexistent.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used as a substitute for the brother I never had. It seems ridiculous, but I’ve always wanted a… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“If I were an armadillo, and a stranger came up and said I looked familiar, and they wanted to know why I… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A person’s favorite word is brother, because he or she can relate to it. I love it because we value most in… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I went to a gun range and shot a man made out of paper. That paper man must have had a brother,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used to replace the brother you never had. Well, it’s only a possibility, but you probably won’t like… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I notice when you’re gone. Or do I? How can I observe something that isn’t there?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“A blanket could be used to make sweet, sweet music with the love of your life. Hopefully that person is me, because I’ve been… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“A brick could be used to slow down time. Sort of like a camel in a wheelchair pushed by a thirsty Arab. Hey, Khalid,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“I hid Mrs. Frozenwater’s body in the ice cube trays in my freezer. Better to keep her there than let her memory thaw out… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“Two similar words might lead to two similar ideas. They might also lead to the basement, which I recently converted into a dungeon/torture chamber.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“Nothing is and isn’t; nothing is and isn’t—nothing itself is, and at the same time, nothing isn’t.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“Orafoura once told me that if I were a car, I’d be a Ferrari. One that was scratched smashed, rusted, and stolen.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“What makes a good leader? I ask myself this every day, and then as I begin to list off characteristics I realize I’m describing… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
“I’d like to file a missing person’s report—on my clone. It’s nearly 2012. He should have been here by now.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share
