Funny SMS / Text Messages

Interviewer: There are 500 bricks on a plane.
You drop one outside. How many are left?
Applicant: That's easy, 499

Interviewer: What are the three steps to put an elephant into a fridge?
Applicant: Open the fridge.
Put the elephant in.
Close the fridge.

Interviewer: What are the four steps to put a deer into the fridge?
Applicant: Open the fridge.
Take the elephant out.
Put the deer in.
Close the fridge.

Interviewer: It's lion's birthday,
all the animals are there except one, why?
Applicant: Because the deer is in the fridge.

Interviewer: How does an old woman cross a swamp filled with crocodiles?
Applicant: She just crosses it
because the crocodiles are at the lion's birthday.

Interviewer: Last question.
In the end the old lady still died, Why?

Applicant: Err....I guess she drowned?
Interviewer: No! She was hit by the brick. You may leave now.

What gift you want for your birthday

Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday?

Son : Not much dad,
just a radio with a sports car around it.

New APP for Husbands in iphone 7

After massive demand from all husbands...
A new app called,"Fear" is launched in IPHONE 7
You just say ,"Wife"
and it immediately closes all websites,
hides all chats,
shuts down all games,
hide all special folders
and
deletes chat history!

and best above all,
it puts your wife's photograph as a wallpaper.

New sim to surprise her husband

Woman Buys A New Sim
Card Puts It In Her Phone
And Decides To Surprise Her
Husband Who Is Seated On
The Couch In The Living Room.

She Goes To The Kitchen,
Calls Her Husband With
The New Number:

"Hello Darling"
The Husband Responds
In A Low Tone:

"Let Me Call U Back
Later Honey, The Dumb
Lady Is In The Kitchen.. =P

Good / bad news after wife accident

A man received d phone
from emergency room of hospital

Doctor: Your wife was in a fatal car
accident & I've bad n good news.
The bad news is,
She has lost both arms n legs n
will b on a respirator d rest of her life.

Man: 0h my God, whats the good
news?

Doctor: I'm kidding, She is Dead... =P =D

What A Dialogue!! :D

Boy askd girl: y do u love a rose,
Which dies in a day. But
Don't love me,
Who dies 4 u everyday??

Girl replied:
.

.

.

Oye hoye...
What a dialogue!! :d

Dil ka dard dil torrne waley kiya jaaney

Dil ka dard dil torrne waley kiya jaaney,
Pyar ke rivajon ko zamana kiya jaaney,

Hoti hai kitni takleef larrki ko pataney main,
Ye ghar pe baitha larki ka baap kiya jaaney

True bravery is to arrive home

True bravery is to arrive home ...
fully drunk..
a late night out..

and mom waiting with a jharu
in hand and you ask

"hey mom, abhi tak jaag rahi ho."

I am the ninth letter

TEACHER: Kashif, give me a sentence starting with "I".
Kashif: I is ......

TEACHER: No, Kashif. Always say, "I am."
Kashif: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

Sweet demand by kid

A Sweet demand by a kid.
A kid was beaten by his mom.
Dad came n asked- what happen son?
Kid said-I cant adjust with your wife anymore,
I want my own.

Chand to tum ho hi,

Kash tumhare chere pe chicken-pox ke daag hote,
.
.
.
chand to tum ho hi,
sitaray bhi saath hote!!

Lion bounced on wife

In an African Safari,A LION suddenly bounced on Santa's wife.
WIFE-Shoot him! Shoot him!
SANTA-Yes Yes.I'm changing d battery of my camera..