Funny SMS / Text Messages

Employer: In this job we need someone who is responsible.

Applicant: I'm the one you want.
On my last job, every time anything went wrong,
they said I was responsible.

I am beautiful, which tense is it?

A very old lady teacher of English
ask this question with the class:

When I say "I am beautiful", which tense is it?

One pupil answered: Its the past tense of course.

143 means ???

143 means?
Do u want to know
what it means?
Press Down..
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It means
ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY THREE.
Tomorrow I will teach u 144.

Do you love me just because..?

He said... Do u love me just coz
my father left me a fortune?
She said... No stupid, I'd love u no matter
who left you the money!

You are a DOG...

You are a DOG...
D = Darling
O = Of
G = Girls
Now u r smiling na?
Am i right??
Tu sach mein kutta hai

1 day u'll B srprisd 2 c ME beside U.

1 day u'll B srprisd 2 c ME beside U.
U & ME laughing,
U & ME crying,
U & ME dreaming,
U & ME holding on,
U & ME...
just U & ME sitting in a MENTAL HOSPITAL & ME CHECKING U.

Judge: U r crossing the limits.

Judge: U r crossing the limits.
Lawyer: Kaun Saala aisa kehta hai?
Judge: How dare you call me saala?
Lawyer: My Lord, I said kaun 'Sa Law' kehta hai?

Salty Eggs

Major Rohail:
Dude EGGS are extra salty today€¦
Tooo much Salt..why?
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Waiter:
Sir hen is suffring from high blood
Pressure

A boy goes to see a dance

A boy goes to see a dance.

His mom angrily asks him:
Did u see anything there that
u were not supposed to see?

Boy: yes, I saw dad!

A girl & boy story

Boy:I love u
Girl:Me too
Boy:Tum mujhe kitna pyar karti ho?
Girl:Jitna tum mujhe karte ho
Boy: U cheater..
main samjha tum waqai mujh se pyar karti ho€¦

Oh shitt.. jal gaya:p

What was GOD's First Reaction
when he made a Negro(African)?

Socho...

Dont know..

Oh! shit jal gaya!!