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Asks Quote by Simon Rich

“There are actual monsters in the world, but when my kids ask I pretend like there aren’t.” quote by Simon Rich — Download Open image

““There are actual monsters in the world, but when my kids ask I pretend like there aren’t.””

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Asks Kids Monsters World

More by Simon Rich

Most of my work is, I get an idea, and, with the help of Wikipedia, I can write. I don't have to leave my…

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I never felt ostracized or made to feel strange by obsessing over 'The Onion' or 'Calvin and Hobbes.' That was considered completely normal.

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It's easier to be a grownup than to be a kid. When you're a kid, you lie constantly and people are always calling you…

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I was never a cool person; in fact, cool people have always made fun of me. That’s why I loved [the Robert Cormier YA…

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I try not to write jokes that are mean. I try my best to write jokes that are pretty universal and jokes that don't…

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People are funny in like young adulthood, just like how people's musical tastes are cool, but it changes very rapidly. In five or ten…

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“I still remember the day I got my first calculator Teacher: All right, children, welcome to fourth grade math. Everyone take a calculator out…

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I admired the earnestness of these people, many of whom had joined Greenpeace and marched for noble things in their youth. But I didn’t…

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I wanted to be an artist after all, and my teachers told me these were the best authors the 20th century had to offer.…

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“Before OkCupid profiles became mandated by the Galactic Government, the only way to find a mate was to self-induce brain-damage and beg strangers for…

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“God: Check out this human I designed. Angel: Wow, that looks pretty incredible. How does it work? God: It's pretty complicated. Point to something…

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“I know the odds are against us. I know she’s a siren. I know she’s eaten people. I know she’s five thousand years older…

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More Asks quotes

If you ask an introvert a question, wait until she thinks about it. Introverts think before speaking, not through speaking. If you want to…

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I don't wear a watch because I want my arms to weigh the same. So if somebody asks me what time it is, I…

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I am a practicing Catholic, but my lineage is Jewish, so if someone asks me if I'm Jewish, I say yes.

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Freedom in every sense but primarily political sense, a rise in repression that stems from a repression of sexuality. It's AIDS, it's herpes, it's…

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Why did Erich von Stronheim leave Germany? Why did Hitchcock leave England? If you were a director you'd like to work in Hollywood too.…

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There is nothing more I ask of this life than this moment, exactly so. And suddenly forever seems like too short a time.

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Success will come when the societal attitude changes and not a single woman in America asks herself the question 'What did I do?'.

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The most fundamental question we can ever ask ourselves is whether or not the universe we live in is friendly or hostile.

Albert Einstein

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The rich people are apparently leaving America. They're giving up their citizenship. These great lovers of America who made their money in this country-when…

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There is a way to be a woman, ask for what we deserve and be able to negotiate.

Tracee Ellis Ross

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For someone to ask 'Who did you play for' and to be able to answer a single name 'Liverpool' that would be brilliant...I don't…

Jamie Carragher

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I have no hesitation in saying that although the American woman never leaves her domestic sphere and is in some respects very dependent within…

Alexis de Tocqueville

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