Attracted Quote by Melissa Febos
““How often we set this trap for ourselves. I had learned to act as if I were the person I wished to be: an ascetically self-sufficient woman, a woman without needs, a woman immune to disappointment. And I found or urged myself to be attracted to people whom only such a woman should love.””
About This Quote
Source Book: “The Other Side of the Door” by Melissa Febos, 2015
We often create unrealistic self-images and then seek partners who fit those fantasies, leading to disappointment.
In simple terms: We set impossible standards for ourselves and attract unsuitable partners.
Key Takeaway
Recognize realistic expectations and authentic self‑acceptance.
Themes
self‑image
relationships
authenticity
expectations
disappointment
Mood
reflective
melancholic
insightful
Type
philosophical
personal development
When to use this quote
- dating
- personal growth
- self‑reflection
- relationship counseling
Key Concepts
psychology
self‑concept
idealization
Questions to Reflect On
- What standards are you imposing on yourself?
- How can you embrace your true needs?
A Different Perspective
Idealized self‑images can blind us to genuine connections.
![“The self is defined psychologically as the psychic totality of the individual. Anything that a [person] postulates as being a greater totality than [oneself] can become a symbol of the self. For this reason the symbol of the self is not always as total as the definition would require.” quote by Carl Jung](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/251/carl-jung-274_defined_the-self-is-defined-psychologically-as-t_7148.jpg)
