Medicine Quote by Jackie French Koller

““A nurse walked in with some pills and a cup of water. “I told you, I don’t need that stuff,” Mr. Jones told her. “What I want is a doctor so I can get out of here.” The nurse smiled and winked at Denny and Spence. “Your friend here is a terrible patient,” she said. “I’m a terrible patient because I don’t belong here. Hospitals are for sick people, and I’ve got work to do. Now, are you going to get me a doctor, or am I going to have to sign myself out AMA?” “AMA?” said Denny. “Against medical advice,” the nurse explained. Then she slapped a blood-pressure cuff on Mr. Jones and stuck a thermometer in his mouth. “Uffoldooommmnofffick!” Mr. Jones mumbled. “Behave yourself,” the nurse told him, “or I’ll order you an enema.” Mr. Jones sank back on the pillow and rolled his eyes. The nurse took the thermometer out and read it. “The doctor will be in later,” she said, winking at Denny and Spence again on her way out. Spence started to chuckle. “I guess she told you,” he said. “Confounded hospitals,” Mr. Jones mumbled. “Once they get their hands on you they never want to let you go.” “Well, you can relax,” said Denny. “The folks in town are taking care of the boat and—” “What!” said Mr. Jones, bolting up in bed. “Ow!” He grabbed his head and lay down again. “Hangover, huh?” said Spence. “What do you mean, taking care of the boat?” asked Mr. Jones, his eyes scrunched up in pain. “Hiram Turner and a bunch of the guys are going to clean her up and put her in the water for you,” said Denny. Mr. Jones groaned. “It’s not that I’m not appreciative,” he said, “but are you sure they know what they’re doing?” Spence smiled. “Those old boys know boats better than you know your backside,” he said. “They’ll have her bungs up and bilge free in no time.” “Is that good?” asked Denny. “I believe it means shipshape,” said Mr. Jones. Spence nodded.””

— Jackie French Koller