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Golf Quotes by Brian Weiss
- The ball retriever is not long enough to get my putter out of the tree.
- That putt had more breaks than a government job.
- That divot is so deep, I will need a sod cutter to fix it.
- Never take a mulligan on a par 3. A "hole in three" is not a fun story to relive.
- I was asked by a golfer how to lower his scores. I replied start playing 9 holes instead of 18. I worked for me, it…
- Golf is like smoking, I have been trying to quit for years.
- I was on in two.... then again on four...
- It breaks towards the center of the earth when it is above the hole.
More Golf Quotes
- I still don't get golf. — Lance Armstrong
- It's nice to win. I'll never win again. I may have to take up golf - take on Tiger. — Lance Armstrong
- Middle age occurs when you are too young to take up golf and too old to rush up to the net. — Franklin P. Adams
- Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. — Dave Barry
- For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball. — Dave Barry
- Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. — Jack Benny
- I enjoy now doing what I do... playing golf, relaxing a little, enjoying life. — Yogi Berra
- I didn't know much about golf growing up. — Yogi Berra
- You can spend the money on new housing for poor people and the homeless, or you can spend it on a football… — Jello Biafra
- Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. — Jim Bishop
- I think one reason people play golf is it allows them to obsess about something other than the daily crap. It takes… — Lewis Black
- If I get a week off, I'll go to a hotel that has a golf course. I like to come downstairs and… — Lewis Black